If you ever find yourself using the words academic and demonoligist together you should
Author Archive for Vince
I came across this article over at Richard Dawkins' site and it made me giggle.
If you ever find yourself using the words academic and demonoligist together you shouldimmediately dive into a wood chipper call an old priest and a young priest to start on your exorcism!
If you ever find yourself using the words academic and demonoligist together you should
Just when you thought religion couldn't make people do anything else stupid:
We are a silly bunch of monkeys aren't we?
We are a silly bunch of monkeys aren't we?
Bill Maher showing his usual reverence toward religion and the Catholic church in particular. Good stuff.
Okay I suppose a more accurate headline would be:
Delusional parents allow their innocent daughter to die a very slow and excruciatingly painful death while waiting for an imaginary man in the sky to issue a "healing" instead of seeking medical attention.
but you get the point.
Hat tip to Scott for the story.
In which 3rd-world, provincial backwater did this tragedy occur? Yup, you guessed it; right here in the land of the free and home of the brave. Free to believe in silly invisible men and brave enough to entrust your physical well-being to him.
Thanks to religious belief, Weston, Wisconsin now has 1 less little girl that will ever get to play with her friends again, have her first kiss, or get to fall in love. Her parents decided that, what must have been several weeks of illness, was a matter best left to god; and prayed for a healing rather than take their child to a doctor. Sadly, the child had undiagnosed diabetes and her death could have been avoided by the simple administration of insulin. This little girl needed insulin but got prayer instead. Great.
Read the full story from the Associated Press HERE.
As a father, I can only begin to imagine the crippling grief that comes with the death of your child. But the utter senselessness of this tragedy makes it infuriating.
How many millions more must die in religion's name before we cast off the chains of magical thinking?
Delusional parents allow their innocent daughter to die a very slow and excruciatingly painful death while waiting for an imaginary man in the sky to issue a "healing" instead of seeking medical attention.
but you get the point.
Hat tip to Scott for the story.
In which 3rd-world, provincial backwater did this tragedy occur? Yup, you guessed it; right here in the land of the free and home of the brave. Free to believe in silly invisible men and brave enough to entrust your physical well-being to him.
Thanks to religious belief, Weston, Wisconsin now has 1 less little girl that will ever get to play with her friends again, have her first kiss, or get to fall in love. Her parents decided that, what must have been several weeks of illness, was a matter best left to god; and prayed for a healing rather than take their child to a doctor. Sadly, the child had undiagnosed diabetes and her death could have been avoided by the simple administration of insulin. This little girl needed insulin but got prayer instead. Great.
Read the full story from the Associated Press HERE.
As a father, I can only begin to imagine the crippling grief that comes with the death of your child. But the utter senselessness of this tragedy makes it infuriating.
How many millions more must die in religion's name before we cast off the chains of magical thinking?
A big tip of the hat to Hemant over at FriendlyAtheist.com for breaking this story.Apparently our beloved Senate has a resolution in committee that would declare the first weekend in May 2008 as... wait for it....
TEN COMMANDMENTS WEEKEND
Unfebuckinglievable!!
Senate resolution 483 is Sponsored by Sam Brownback and co-sponsored by Joe Lieberman.
You can read the resolution for yourself here .
Perhaps the most ridiculous part of the resolution is that it:
"encourages citizens of the United States to reflect on the integral role that the Ten Commandments have played in the life of the Nation"
Integral role in the life of our nation, huh?
I suppose the good lord made an Ethereal Exemption in the case of America, and actually sanctioned stealing of the land from the natives and killing as many of them as we could; after all they worshiped the dirt and not the Big Guy. Maybe this is where god "blessed"America. And, not to split hairs here, but isn't there freedom of religion in this country. Doesn't that mean that you are free to worship whatever god (or none) that you choose? Isn't this in DIRECT opposition of the FIRST commandment? Hmm?
I like George Carlin's take on the Commandments:
This is but another banana peel placed on the slippery slope of our beloved nation becoming a theocracy, where the only 'separation' remaining is the tax exempt status the church enjoys.
Call your senator and tell him that you do not sanction this silliness!
I came across a BBC documentary entitled Baby Bible Bashers. It has to be one of the most disturbing things I have ever watched on the internet.
This documentary, produced by Channel 4 in the UK, originally aired last month. It focuses around 3 "chosen" children that have a "personal relationship" with god, and are: Preachers! The film follows the children around as they preach to the masses. Watching this physically affected me; I felt sick to my stomach and developed a headache. I found myself saddened for these poor kids and on several occasions just sat there mouth agape, shaking my head in disbelief. Also, in the interest of full disclosure, I have to admit I am a big fat hypocrite. As one who has chosen medicine as my life's work and someone who will be taking the Hippocratic Oath in 2 years, I had several un-Hippocratic ideas waft through my mind as I watched. Most revolved around inflicting blunt force trauma upon some of the parents until the Holy Spirit himself interceded.
One of the most striking scenes involves 7 year-old Samuel. His redneck, inbred, bible thumping parents home school (read: program) young Samuel so that they are free to drive about the country in an RV and pimp out their little boy to stand in public and scream at people not to kill their babies, drink alcohol, and how we are all going to hell yadda yadda yadda. Interestingly enough- at one point mom asks the cameras to be turned off while she "trains" her precocious preacher for not listening- (something 7 year-olds are wont to do) Spare not the rod... and all of that. They are followed as they head to New York city to spew their venom on a street corner. As you can imagine some of the warm-hearted denizens of the city were, shall we say, less than receptive to their message. While dad is in a yelling match with a member of the crowd, the camera pans to young Samuel. Clearly he is terrified. He is, after all, still just a little boy underneath all of the fervor and religious rhetoric. It is quite heartbreaking.
These people are straight-up abusing their children! There is no other way to describe it. None of the 3 kids is old enough to have mastered long division, let along preach religion. Wait, after considering that sentence I admit, you don't have to know anything to preach religion. But I assure you they certainly do not understand what it is that they are saying.
Just as an observation, I get the suspicion that there is something not quite right about the relationship between the girl from Brazil and her father, maybe I'm wrong. Watch it and you tell me.
The video below is in 5 parts and in total is bout 45 minutes. It is well done and very thought provoking. It is definitely worth the time. I hope they show it on American television with the same frequency as some of the garbage reality shows. Perhaps people would ask, "What harm is there in religion?" a lot less.
This documentary, produced by Channel 4 in the UK, originally aired last month. It focuses around 3 "chosen" children that have a "personal relationship" with god, and are: Preachers! The film follows the children around as they preach to the masses. Watching this physically affected me; I felt sick to my stomach and developed a headache. I found myself saddened for these poor kids and on several occasions just sat there mouth agape, shaking my head in disbelief. Also, in the interest of full disclosure, I have to admit I am a big fat hypocrite. As one who has chosen medicine as my life's work and someone who will be taking the Hippocratic Oath in 2 years, I had several un-Hippocratic ideas waft through my mind as I watched. Most revolved around inflicting blunt force trauma upon some of the parents until the Holy Spirit himself interceded.
One of the most striking scenes involves 7 year-old Samuel. His redneck, inbred, bible thumping parents home school (read: program) young Samuel so that they are free to drive about the country in an RV and pimp out their little boy to stand in public and scream at people not to kill their babies, drink alcohol, and how we are all going to hell yadda yadda yadda. Interestingly enough- at one point mom asks the cameras to be turned off while she "trains" her precocious preacher for not listening- (something 7 year-olds are wont to do) Spare not the rod... and all of that. They are followed as they head to New York city to spew their venom on a street corner. As you can imagine some of the warm-hearted denizens of the city were, shall we say, less than receptive to their message. While dad is in a yelling match with a member of the crowd, the camera pans to young Samuel. Clearly he is terrified. He is, after all, still just a little boy underneath all of the fervor and religious rhetoric. It is quite heartbreaking.
These people are straight-up abusing their children! There is no other way to describe it. None of the 3 kids is old enough to have mastered long division, let along preach religion. Wait, after considering that sentence I admit, you don't have to know anything to preach religion. But I assure you they certainly do not understand what it is that they are saying.
Just as an observation, I get the suspicion that there is something not quite right about the relationship between the girl from Brazil and her father, maybe I'm wrong. Watch it and you tell me.
The video below is in 5 parts and in total is bout 45 minutes. It is well done and very thought provoking. It is definitely worth the time. I hope they show it on American television with the same frequency as some of the garbage reality shows. Perhaps people would ask, "What harm is there in religion?" a lot less.
Apparently, Big Daddy G's omniscience generator was on the fritz during the first dictation of the Ten Commandments.
He had no idea that only a few thousand years down the road there would be pollution or biotechnology (or rational thought).
Luckily, the Vatican is johnny-on-the-spot to editorialize (again) for the neglectful deity.
Story Here.
He had no idea that only a few thousand years down the road there would be pollution or biotechnology (or rational thought).
Luckily, the Vatican is johnny-on-the-spot to editorialize (again) for the neglectful deity.
Story Here.
Imagine writing this on your resume:
Integral member of research team that electronically stimulated anteaters to elicit ejaculations. Explored the quaternary structure of the spiny anteater penis.
It can always get worse.
Full story (and video) from New Scientist HERE
Integral member of research team that electronically stimulated anteaters to elicit ejaculations. Explored the quaternary structure of the spiny anteater penis.
It can always get worse.
Full story (and video) from New Scientist HERE
The wife and I were grocery shopping today and I came across this little gem of a product. I was forced to buy it since I didn't have my camera in the store with me. But how could I resist? Right there on the shelf next to the Cap'n Crunch was genuine god cereal.
The cereal is made by an organic whole grain food company named Food for Life.
They also make a line of Genesis1:29 grain and seed breads.
I did actually taste the product. It has the consistency of gravel but taste kind of like Grape Nuts. Edible at best but nothing heavenly tasting for sure; although I do have the sudden urge to denounce evolution, beat up a homosexual, and talk to an imaginary friend.
Saying something nice about religion.
Former senator Rick Santorum, the intelligent design proponent, gay basher, and all around neocon-wingnut, appeared at Penn State University yesterday to speak at the "Islamo-Fascist Awareness Week" festivities.
In what can only be described as an enlightening quote, Santorum said:
"While Christianity presents a humble, meek message emphasizing love, Islam stemmed from the strong rule of the prophet Mohammed.So, like collecting stamps or building model trains, Christianity is merely a stupid hobby only to engaged in on Sundays. Cool. Thanks Rick.
Every aspect of life was ruled. Islam, unlike Christianity, is an all-encompassing ideology, It is not just something you do on Sunday…. We [as Americans] don’t get that."
I try to keep an ear to the ground when it comes to news about religion from around the world, but this story slipped by under my radar. Thankfully a fellow blogger, Psychodiva, posted about it and I feel compelled to do the same. The story is from last week's edition of the UK's Sunday Times and will make your head explode. Read it online here.
The gist of the article is that a group of Muslim medical school students are refusing to attend lectures, learn material, or answer exam questions that they feel is offensive to their religious beliefs. For instance, a group of students have refused to learn about alcohol related illnesses or sexually transmitted diseases since their religion does not allow drinking or promiscuity(or free thought, or tolerance but I digress). Some have even refused to examine female patients. Perhaps these pent-a-worshiping nutcases should have made a better choice of career. (like homeopathy or chiropractic care) Seriously, they are trying to enter a profession whose charge it is to heal and comfort those in need. Do they honestly believe that helping a "sinner" is being an accomplice after the fact? Not very tolerant or compassionate or helpful for that matter.
Do obese patients not get any care because of their sins of gluttony? What about diabetics(type 2) or people with coronary artery disease- much of their morbidity is self-induced not to mention smokers who develop lung cancer. Physicians should not be judgmental, in fact exactly the opposite is true. Without a trusting and honest relationship with a patient a physician will not be able to effectively treat someone. I am finishing my second year of medical school and I can't imagine trying to omit any of the things we have learned about. Trust me, there are things I wish I didn't have to know- but in the end the more I know the better service I can be to my patients.
I spent 6 years as a paramedic and another 4 as an ER nurse and believe me, I would have preferred that all of my patients to be of the clean, sober, appreciative, non self-destructive, non-combative, non-odorous and especially continent variety. Alas, this was not the reality. While I didn't agree with many of the choices my patients had made, my job was not to judge them or turn a blind pious eye- my job was to help. If you are already refusing to help a certain population of patients, then you have NO BUSINESS BEING A PHYSICIAN. Pray to Allah for a new career path! I hope the British Medical Association tells these students to go get fucked and never allows them to become doctors.
The article also reports that Sainsbury's, a large supermarket chain in th UK, has allowed its Muslim check out clerks to refuse to ring up purchases that contain alcohol, requiring another employee to drop what they are doing and take the place of the Muslim clerk. When will this political correctness insanity stop?
It's simple, if you want to believe in fairy tales and chose live your life based on some ridiculous scribblings in an old book, well, fine for you. But you can't expect, nor do you deserve, special accommodations be made just because your personal brand of delusion is a religious one!
The gist of the article is that a group of Muslim medical school students are refusing to attend lectures, learn material, or answer exam questions that they feel is offensive to their religious beliefs. For instance, a group of students have refused to learn about alcohol related illnesses or sexually transmitted diseases since their religion does not allow drinking or promiscuity(or free thought, or tolerance but I digress). Some have even refused to examine female patients. Perhaps these pent-a-worshiping nutcases should have made a better choice of career. (like homeopathy or chiropractic care) Seriously, they are trying to enter a profession whose charge it is to heal and comfort those in need. Do they honestly believe that helping a "sinner" is being an accomplice after the fact? Not very tolerant or compassionate or helpful for that matter.
Do obese patients not get any care because of their sins of gluttony? What about diabetics(type 2) or people with coronary artery disease- much of their morbidity is self-induced not to mention smokers who develop lung cancer. Physicians should not be judgmental, in fact exactly the opposite is true. Without a trusting and honest relationship with a patient a physician will not be able to effectively treat someone. I am finishing my second year of medical school and I can't imagine trying to omit any of the things we have learned about. Trust me, there are things I wish I didn't have to know- but in the end the more I know the better service I can be to my patients.
I spent 6 years as a paramedic and another 4 as an ER nurse and believe me, I would have preferred that all of my patients to be of the clean, sober, appreciative, non self-destructive, non-combative, non-odorous and especially continent variety. Alas, this was not the reality. While I didn't agree with many of the choices my patients had made, my job was not to judge them or turn a blind pious eye- my job was to help. If you are already refusing to help a certain population of patients, then you have NO BUSINESS BEING A PHYSICIAN. Pray to Allah for a new career path! I hope the British Medical Association tells these students to go get fucked and never allows them to become doctors.
The article also reports that Sainsbury's, a large supermarket chain in th UK, has allowed its Muslim check out clerks to refuse to ring up purchases that contain alcohol, requiring another employee to drop what they are doing and take the place of the Muslim clerk. When will this political correctness insanity stop?
It's simple, if you want to believe in fairy tales and chose live your life based on some ridiculous scribblings in an old book, well, fine for you. But you can't expect, nor do you deserve, special accommodations be made just because your personal brand of delusion is a religious one!
Well, well, well. It the latest of what seems to a never ending parade of hypocrisy and embarrassment, the Vatican has suspended Monsignor Tommaso Stenico after he was caught on hidden camera making sexual advances to a young man. Story Here.
This of course wouldn't be all that newsworthy- rather cliche' actually. But this particular priest is a top official of the Vatican's Congregation of the Clergy. The Congregation of the Clergy is an in-house body that tries to ensure "proper conduct" by priests. Good stuff.
Monsignor Stenico's defense? He claims he was only "pretending" to be gay as part of his work in cleaning up the church. (not to be confused with the famous, "I'm not gay but the men I have sex with are" defense!)
He states he was only gathering information against "those who damage the image of the Church with homosexual activity". He was captured on video via hidden camera saying that he didn't feel he was sinning by having sex with men. The Vatican's official position on homosexuality is of course different than the monsignor's, they maintain homosexual "activity" is a sin. (I wonder about their stance on broadway musicals or figure skating)
Oh, the hypocrisy!
When will the world finally wake up and see just how repressive and corrosive religion is? Not that I don't enjoy seeing blow-hard hypocrites like this priest, Senator Larry Craig, Ted Haggard, etc etc etc get nailed; (no pun intended) but what kind of world has religion created that turns people into self-loathing bigots that persecute others?
It boggles my mind that people actually believe there is an invisible magical space god who watches your every move and hates it when people of the same sex love each other in a romantic way. Really?
Pope Benedict XVI addressed the South Koreans yesterday and urged them not to continue with embryonic stem cell research or human cloning. He also praised them for their work in urging the North Koreans to abandon their nuclear aspirations. he said
"It is my ardent hope that the ongoing participation of various countries involved in the negotiation process will lead to a cessation of programs designed to develop and produce weapons with frightening potential for unspeakable destruction,"In the frightening potential foe unspeakable destruction department the catholics don't like competition.
The pope went on to acknowledge South Korea's success in scientific research but warned that:
"research must be carried out with firm ethical standards that always respect the dignity of human life.""Firm" standards huh...firm, as in the buttocks of an 11 year old boy? Or perhaps he meant respecting the dignity of life- like his church's policy of spreading propaganda about the use of condoms throughout Africa.
Why don't you just shove that silly looking hat up your ass and keep your hypocritical mouth shut!
Hysterical song parody from last night's Saturday Night Live.
I took a couple days off from the news and one of the first stories I read today was this little gem from the BBC.
It seems those kooky Catholics are at it again. This time Archbishop Francisco Chimoio, the head of the Catholic Church in Mozambique has make some insanely incredible claims. He tells the BBC reporter that he believes that some European made condoms, as well as some anti-viral medications, are being laced with the HIV virus to purposely infect the people of Africa. He goes on to say " Condoms are not sure because I know that there are two countries in Europe, they are making condoms with the virus on purpose," but refused to name the countries or companies.
Wow!
How low will these retards sink? With some 500 new cases of HIV infection daily in Mozambique and over 16% of the country already infected, I shudder to think how many deaths will be caused by this douche-nozzle's remarks. Once again the Church seems to support the use of fear and propaganda to push their morality on people- even if it means their death. They continue to promote marital fidelity and abstinence (nothing wrong with those ideas) as the ONLY morally acceptable way to prevent contracting HIV. This is not only irresponsible, it should be criminal. Ironically, the church is against the death penalty. (unless of course your crime happens to be premarital or extramarital sex, well, then you deserve to die.)
Raping innocent children, OK. Having sex before you are married, it's a slow and painful death for you.
Thank god we have religion in the world!
It seems those kooky Catholics are at it again. This time Archbishop Francisco Chimoio, the head of the Catholic Church in Mozambique has make some insanely incredible claims. He tells the BBC reporter that he believes that some European made condoms, as well as some anti-viral medications, are being laced with the HIV virus to purposely infect the people of Africa. He goes on to say " Condoms are not sure because I know that there are two countries in Europe, they are making condoms with the virus on purpose," but refused to name the countries or companies.
Wow!
How low will these retards sink? With some 500 new cases of HIV infection daily in Mozambique and over 16% of the country already infected, I shudder to think how many deaths will be caused by this douche-nozzle's remarks. Once again the Church seems to support the use of fear and propaganda to push their morality on people- even if it means their death. They continue to promote marital fidelity and abstinence (nothing wrong with those ideas) as the ONLY morally acceptable way to prevent contracting HIV. This is not only irresponsible, it should be criminal. Ironically, the church is against the death penalty. (unless of course your crime happens to be premarital or extramarital sex, well, then you deserve to die.)
Raping innocent children, OK. Having sex before you are married, it's a slow and painful death for you.
Thank god we have religion in the world!
As posted on my other blog:
With American soldiers dying everyday, $700 million leaking out of our national coffers on a daily basis, over 40 million Americans without health insurance, and the threat of confrontation with Iran looming in the distance, it is comforting that our beloved congress has nothing better to do than engage in what amounts to political masturbation. Saber-rattling and grandstanding by congress is a waste of time. And doesn't the congress have more important things to do?
Yesterday the House of Representatives followed the Senate in their invertebrate fashion and passed a resolution condemning the infamous MoveOn.org ad that ran earlier this month in the New York Times.
The ad essentially is critical of the apparent discrepancy between the statistics offered by Petraeus at the congressional testimony and actual data. The ad claims that Petraeus' numbers are painting a rosier picture in Iraq because of the unorthodox method that the data is tabulated; for instance: deaths from car bombs are not counted, nor are assassinations included unless the person was shot in the head. The ad asks the question: "General Petraeus, or General Betray Us". Now regardless of your politics, I think it is key to keep one thing in mind:
NO ONE IN A FREE SOCIETY IS BEYOND REPROACH!
That means we get to ask questions and criticize and even say "Fuck Bush" in a college newspaper if we so choose. It is the one thing that defines who we are and is the backbone of a free society.
With American soldiers dying everyday, $700 million leaking out of our national coffers on a daily basis, over 40 million Americans without health insurance, and the threat of confrontation with Iran looming in the distance, it is comforting that our beloved congress has nothing better to do than engage in what amounts to political masturbation. Saber-rattling and grandstanding by congress is a waste of time. And doesn't the congress have more important things to do?Yesterday the House of Representatives followed the Senate in their invertebrate fashion and passed a resolution condemning the infamous MoveOn.org ad that ran earlier this month in the New York Times.
The ad essentially is critical of the apparent discrepancy between the statistics offered by Petraeus at the congressional testimony and actual data. The ad claims that Petraeus' numbers are painting a rosier picture in Iraq because of the unorthodox method that the data is tabulated; for instance: deaths from car bombs are not counted, nor are assassinations included unless the person was shot in the head. The ad asks the question: "General Petraeus, or General Betray Us". Now regardless of your politics, I think it is key to keep one thing in mind:
NO ONE IN A FREE SOCIETY IS BEYOND REPROACH!
That means we get to ask questions and criticize and even say "Fuck Bush" in a college newspaper if we so choose. It is the one thing that defines who we are and is the backbone of a free society.
Our praise isn't funky enough...
I wonder Paul Eugene is familiar with a certain passage in Leviticus that explicitly classifies Jazz-hands as an abomination...
I wonder Paul Eugene is familiar with a certain passage in Leviticus that explicitly classifies Jazz-hands as an abomination...
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Iran's provocative president spoke at Columbia University today. The university's president gave him the glowing introduction he desrved, calling him a "cruel dictator" and accused him of being either "brazenly provocative or astonishingly uneducated" regarding his denial of the Holocaust.
When asked about the reported abuse of women and homosexuals in his country, Ahmadinejad responded," We don't have homosexuals. [in Iran.] I don't know who told you we had it."
One wonders if that is the case because of some previously unstudied Founder Effect seen in the genetics of the population of Iran. Perhaps his Islamic fundamentalist fascist regime simply exterminates all the homosexuals. Or just maybe people live in repressed denial and fear and can not publicly admit to the nature of their sexuality. In either case I would doubt that there are no homosexuals in Iran.
I'll never understand the unhealthy obsession the religious have with sexuality.
If you ask me, god seems a little too preoccupied with who we all have sex with.
Perhaps Mahmoud doth protest too much:
Quick, book a flight to Miami. Go ahead, right now, I'll wait.Got your ticket? Great, now you will be able to wait in line for hours outside of St. Brendan's Church for your chance to catch a glimpse of your favorite Zombie-in-Savior and his never-been-laid mom!
OK , well, not exactly them- but shadows of them; well, not exactly shadows of them- shadows that kinda sorta look like what is widely accepted to be what they would look like if they actually existed and if you squint your eyes just right and.. oh yeah, you happen to be an idiot!
Yeah that sounds about right.
Video of the news report here. **Warning Explicit Stupidity**
My favorite part is when the woman interviewed (a teacher) clarifies that what she sees is the ADULT Jesus. ( I assume to clarify it from the 8 pound 6 ounce baby Jesus, newborn not even spoken a word yet, who is just sitting in his crib watching Baby Einstein videos learning about shapes and colors.)
Yes, I'm certain that your imaginary friendly ghost-god is making himself "appear" to you through shadows on a piece of cloth. I'm sure that, after careful consideration, he has decided that this is the most effective and clear way to communicate his ethereal shadowy goodness to you, his adoring sheep-like bipeds. Its a genuine miracle! Gather up your sick, crippled, and afflicted and head on over St. Brendan's Catholic Church to ask the Rorschach spot on the tapestry to intervene on your behalf. The idiocy abounds!
New ideas to pay for my medical school loans:
- I trowel some dog shit shit onto a poster board and randomly swirl. Those posters that have the slightest hint of a humanoid figure I auction off on: www.Iamahighlysuggestibleretardedbeliever.com claiming it is a miracle.
- I print up and sell t-shirts that say "I waited in line all day to see some shadows and all I got was this fucking t-shirt"
In a country whose television broadcasting companies censor Kath Griffin saying "No one had less to do with this award [emmy] than Jesus." and truncate Sally Fields acceptance speech for her anti-war rhetoric and the showing of a female nipple causes our collective hearts to go all aflutter; apparently it is OK to air this:
What mindless ignorant drivel. I am starting to believe the US is almost beyond hope. Idiocy abounds.
This piece is chock-full-o-nuttery but these are my favorite quotes:
If anyone needs me I'll be on the phone with a Realtor in Australia. (or as our president like to say, "Austria")
What mindless ignorant drivel. I am starting to believe the US is almost beyond hope. Idiocy abounds.
This piece is chock-full-o-nuttery but these are my favorite quotes:
"I don't know if the world is flat...I never thought about it before"I think this one has been handled -several hundred years ago. Globe makers be warned. Keep an eye out for a drastic drop in globe sales.
"Babies being born in sperms"Actually there captain biology, methinks that you need an egg as well.
"I have a bible in which god says....he said he created the earth"Oh well that settles it then doesn't it. If HE said so then it must be true. By the way I was wondering who took dictation from HIM?
"The bible is certainly to be respected and beloved"Incest, rape, murder, genocide, magic tricks, unicorns, dragons, and zombies ALL in the bible. Whats not to Love? If you want to respect a book, try Green Eggs and Ham by Dr. Seuss certainly a much more worthy piece of literature and certainly more appropriate for children.
If anyone needs me I'll be on the phone with a Realtor in Australia. (or as our president like to say, "Austria")
God must be big fan of his own handiwork. Especially the very cool job he has done (non-evolutionarily) with viruses. They are almost perfect. Perfect little disease making machines. Unless of course your immune system recognizes them and prevents them from taking hold. Thats what vaccines do. They give our immune systems little Most-Wanted posters so our cells can be on the lookout for certain unsavory little viruses and prevent them from wreaking havoc in our bodies.One such little trouble maker is HPV (human papilloma virus) among its rap sheet is its ability to cause genital warts and more frighteningly its implication in causing cervical cancer. HPV is sexually transmitted and happens to be fairly common. According to the CDC (Centers for Disease Control and prevention) :
Approximately 20 million people are currently infected with HPV. At least 50 percent of sexually active men and women acquire genital HPV infection at some point in their lives. By age 50, at least 80 percent of women will have acquired genital HPV infection. About 6.2 million Americans get a new genital HPV infection each year.A few years back Merck developed a vaccine to prevent 4 of the more virulent strains of HPV most associated with cancer. It is too early to say for sure the exact impact of this vaccine but with 3700 deaths from cervical cancer in the US alone (much higher in other countries without agressive sceenings such as PAP smears etc.) it has the potential to save many many lives.
Two of my own daughters (ages 15 and 14) have received the vaccine and pediatricians across the world are recommending it to girls (vaccine is only tested and approved for girls) and can be given as early as age 9 an up to 26. When my youngest is old enough I will certainly make sure she gets vaccinated as well.
In Canada, a Ontario school board held a hearing last night to decide whether they should ban the vaccine which is currently offered to its 8 grade girls in an attempt to reduce the number of cervical cancer cases. Fortunately they decided against the ban. Why in the world would anyone want to ban such a potentially life saving vaccine you ask? Yep you guessed it RELIGION.
It seems the Bishops of the province weighed in and demanded it be pulled from the schools. You see since HPV is sexually transmitted and in their eyes there is no reason to have sex if you are not married and if you do well, thats a sin and ..I assume they think you DESERVE cancer. Not very Christian of them is it? They go on to say in a letter to the school board:
It is up to parents to decide whether their daughters get the vaccine, but HPV can only be contracted through sex, and sex outside marriage carries "profound risks to a young person's spiritual, emotional, moral and physical health," the Conference of Catholic Bishops said in a statement.This is the same sort of logic that the Catholic church is actively spreading throughout the continent of Africa and condeming the use of condoms despite the pandemic status of HIV.
This is the most disgusting and deplorable miscarriage of morality. It should be criminal to use fear and cause the needless deaths of thousands of people! (Insert President Bush comment here)
I can't wait until someone develops a vaccine for religion!
Oh wait we already have one...... It's called THINKING!!!!!
Get yourself vaccinated today!
I suppose he was signing in tongues. Many thanks to Ray for showing me this!
I got a 2$ Starbuck's coupon for anyone who can transcribe this song for me.....
I got a 2$ Starbuck's coupon for anyone who can transcribe this song for me.....
I posted this on my other blog but I wanted readers of this blog to see it too. This is certainly one of my top 3 favorite joke emails of all time. I first got it about 5 years ago and haven't seen it for several years. It is old but still damn funny.I defy you to read this while trying to drink something.
______________________________________________________________
The notes are from an inexperienced Chili taster named Frank, who was visiting Texas from the East Coast:
Frank: "Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The Judge #3 called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking for directions to the Budweiser truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted."
Here are the scorecards from the event:
Chili # 1 (Mike's Maniac Mobster Monster Chili)
Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick.
Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.
Judge # 3 -- (Frank) Holy shit, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.
Chili # 2 (Arthur's Afterburner Chili)
Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.
Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.
Chili # 3 (Fred's Famous Burn Down the Barn Chili)
Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick. Needs more beans.
Judge # 2 -- A beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of peppers.
Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now.
Get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting shit-faced from all of the beer!
Chili # 4 (Bubba's Black Magic)
Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.
Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.
Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds?
Sally, the barmaid, was standing behind me with fresh refills.
That 300-lb. bitch is starting to look HOT... just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chili an aphrodisiac?
Chili # 5 (Linda's Legal Lip Remover)
Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive.
Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato.
Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off. It really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw those rednecks.
Chili # 6 (Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety)
Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers.
Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. Superb.
Judge #3-- I shit myself when I farted and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that slut Sally. She must be kinkier than I thought. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my ass with a snow cone.
Chili # 7 (Susan's Screaming Sensation Chili)
Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. I should take note that I am worried about Judge #3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.
Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava-like shit to match my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing, it's too painful. Screw it; I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.
Chili # 8 (Tommy's Toe-Nail Curling Chili)
Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.
Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge # 3 passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor fella.
Intergalactic Hussy was kind enough to post the story of my descent into heathendom. She runs Coming Out Godless - a collection of personal accounts of "coming-out" into atheism. Head on over there and give some of them a read. Pretty interesting stuff. Share your own story of how you came to be an atheist.
Coming out Godless
Coming out Godless
Planet Atheism buttons
FAQ (includes joining info)
RSS feed
Email subscription
