In the last chapter, an angel showed Nephi all the shit his dad saw and much, much more. Nephi saw dad's magic tree, iron rod, large and spacious building, the exceedingly white virgin Mary, Jesus, John the Baptist, the twelve apostles -- pretty much everything that Joseph Smith the angel could think of at the time.

Now, in this chapter, the angel shows Nephi his seed. He'll have tons of seed, as many as the sand of the sea.

And it came to pass that the angel said unto me: Look, and behold thy seed, and also the seed of thy brethren. And I looked and beheld the land of promise; and I beheld multitudes of people, yea, even as it were in number as many as the sand of the sea. 1 Nephi 12:1

Nephi's seed will live in many cities, more cities than can be counted.

And it came to pass that ... I beheld many cities, yea, even that I did not number them. 1 Nephi 12:3

But bad times are coming. Mountains will disintegrate and cities sink and burn.

I saw mountains tumbling into pieces; and I saw the plains of the earth, that they were broken up; and I saw many cities that they were sunk; and I saw many that they were burned with fire; and I saw many that did tumble to the earth, because of the quaking thereof. 1 Nephi 12:4

Then the heavens will open up and Jesus, the Holy Ghost, and the apostles (with their robes made white from being washed in Jesus' blood) will come down to minster to Nephi's seed.

And I saw the heavens open, and the Lamb of God descending out of heaven; and he came down and showed himself unto them. And I also saw ... the Holy Ghost fell upon twelve others... And these twelve ministers whom thou beholdest shall judge thy seed. And, behold, ... their garments are made white in his blood. 1 Nephi 12:6-10

But Nephi's seed will fight his brethren's seed.

And while the angel spake these words, I beheld and saw that the seed of my brethren did contend against my seed, according to the word of the angel; and because of the pride of my seed, and the temptations of the devil, I beheld that the seed of my brethren did overpower the people of my seed. And it came to pass that I beheld, and saw the people of the seed of my brethren that they had overcome my seed; and they went forth in multitudes upon the face of the land. 1 Nephi 12:19-20

And it will be awful to look at. Seed fighting seed everywhere. I doubt if there has been so much contending seed in a single paragraph since time began. (It is, perhaps, the seediest passage in all literature, with the possible exception of Ezekiel 23:20.)

Finally, the chapter comes to a thrilling conclusion with the angel showing Nephi what will happen to the seed of his brethren that dwindle in unbelief: they will become a dark, loathsome, filthy, idle, and abominable people.

And the angel said unto me: Behold these shall dwindle in unbelief. And it came to pass that I beheld, after they had dwindled in unbelief they became a dark, and loathsome, and a filthy people, full of idleness and all manner of abominations. 1 Nephi 12:22-23

(Which, as we'll see later, is the origin of the Native Americans.)

OK. That might be a bit of an overstatement. But we do seem to agree on pretty much everything that we used to argue about, at least as far as I can tell anyway.

Here is a list of things that Douglas and I now seem to agree on:

1. No one should be burned alive or stoned to death (with the possible exception of pedophile priests).

2. Specifically, the following people and acts should not be punished by stoning, as required by the Bible.

   • Blasphemy or cursing -- Leviticus 24:15-23

   • Wizards or women with familiar spirits – Leviticus 20:27

   • Sabbath breakers – Numbers 15:32-36

   • Stubborn, rebellious, drunken sons – Deuteronomy 21:18-21

   • A city-dwelling virgin that doesn’t cry out when raped -- Deuteronomy 22:23-24

   • A woman who isn’t a virgin on her wedding night -- Deuteronomy 22:13-21

   • People who argue for the existence of another god -- Deuteronomy 13:6-10, 17:2-5

3. No one should obey God’s command to burn people to death. Specifically, the following people should not be burned to death:

   • A man, wife, and her mother if they are having an affair, get married, or whatever. – Leviticus 20:14

   • A priest's daughter that plays the whore – Leviticus 21:9

4. Homosexuals should not be executed. -- Leviticus 20:13

5. A Christian should not own slaves, even if they are treated well.

If you've read my previous posts about Douglas Wilson's views, you'll know that this is quite a change. Douglas and I disagreed on all of these items just a few years ago.

And it's possible that we still do. I haven't yet got a clear answer from Douglas on this list of agreements. But I hope to see it soon here.

(via The Redheaded Skeptic -- be sure to read her Bible Studies!)

1: The Opening

The Lord of the Worlds

2: The Cow

1-13: Allah is wise, mysterious, funny

14-24: Produce a surah the like thereof

24-34: Believers get pure companions in heaven, Adam learns the animals' names, and Iblis becomes a disbeliever

35-74: Allah turns Jews into apes and solves a murder mystery with a dead yellow cow

75-105: Little is that which they believe

106-138: Abrogation, proof, and Allah's coloring book

139-158: Changing holy directions (qiblah)

One of the peculiar things about Muslims is that they have to pray in a particular direction: toward the Kaaba in Mecca. It is also the direction that the faces of dead Muslims point towards, and the direction that the head of an animal is supposed to be aligned with when slaughtered.

It wasn't always that way, though. Originally Muslims prayed toward Jerusalem. But then, for no apparent reason, Allah told Muhammad to start praying toward a black cube-shaped building in Mecca (the Kaaba). The Kaaba, according to Islamic tradition, was the first building on earth. Built by Adam and re-built later by Abraham and Ishmael, the Kaaba is the direction that all Muslims pray toward five times day, and is the holy site that all Muslims are supposed to visit once in their lifetime.

It's all complete bullshit, of course. There was no Adam to build the Kaaba. Abraham probably didn't exist either, but if he did, he didn't visit Mecca. The stories in Islam are as messed up as they are made up. But that doesn't stop 1.3 billion people from believing them.

Allah changed the holy direction in verse 2:143-144 of the Quran. And he blathers on about it in the rest of the verses in this section of Surah 2.

And We appointed the qiblah which ye formerly observed only that We might know him who followeth the messenger, from him who turneth on his heels. In truth it was a hard (test) save for those whom Allah guided. ... We have seen the turning of thy face to heaven (for guidance, O Muhammad). And now verily We shall make thee turn (in prayer) toward a qiblah which is dear to thee. So turn thy face toward the Inviolable Place of Worship, and ye (O Muslims), wheresoever ye may be, turn your faces (when ye pray) toward it. 2:143

But Allah, of course, knew that there would be scoffers (like me) that would complain about Muhammad's arbitrary change of holy directions.

The foolish of the people will say: What hath turned them from the qiblah which they formerly observed? Say: Unto Allah belong the East and the West. He guideth whom He will unto a straight path. 2:142

Yeah, Allah guides whoever the hell he wants on a straight path. And once in a while he changes the direction of the path for no reason whatsoever.

Allah is Responsive, Aware. Arbitrary.

Douglas Wilson doesn't say much (out loud) anymore. But back in the day, before he became famous debating Christopher Hitchens, he used to say the darndest things.

Here, for example, is what he said in his pro-slavery booklet (co-authored in 1996 with Steve Wilkins), Southern Slavery as it Was:

[N]othing is clearer -- the New Testament opposes anything like the abolitionism of our countryprior to the War Between the States. The New Testament contains many instrucitons for Christian slave owners, and requires a respectful submissive demeanor for Christian slaves. See for example, Ephesians 6:5-9, Colossians 3:22-4:1, and 1 Timothy 6:1-5.

...

[I]n this booklet ... we will say (out loud) that a godly man could have been a slave owner. (emphasis in original)

In the last few years, though, Douglas hasn't said much (out loud or in print) about godly Christian slave owners or any of the other interesting things that he apparently still (quietly) believes.

Still, once in a while he slips up and the old Doug slips out.

The Bible teaches that God hates.
...
Not only that, but we cannot take refuge in that famous line about hating the sin but loving the sinner. This text says that God hates the people doing these things, and not just the things that are done.
...
At the Day of Judgment, it will be the sinners that are pitched into Hell, not just their sins. The place where God has made it possible to distinguish sins and sinners is in the cross of Jesus Christ. Because of that, our sins can be taken away from us, and separated from us.
...
But this is not because God decided to stop hating sin. No, He hates sin so much that He poured out His wrath on it, even though the place where that wrath was located was in the person of His Son Jesus Christ. His act of love was also an act of hatred. So they are not opposites. The greatest act of love in the history of the human race was the death of Jesus. But at the same moment, in a different respect, the greatest act of divine hatred was also the cross of Jesus.

So Jesus hates you more than you will ever know. He hates you with the greatest hatred the world has ever known. He hates you even more than Douglas Wilson hates you.

If such a thing is possible, that is.

Jesus said that John the Baptist was the greatest prophet who had ever lived.

For I say unto you, Among those that are born of women there is not a greater prophet than John the Baptist: but he that is least in the kingdom of God is greater than he. Luke 7:28

But that was just because he hadn't yet read the Book of Mormon, so he didn't know about Lehi.

Because when it comes to prophecy, Lehi makes Moses, Muhammad, Jesus, and John the Baptist look like the governing body of the Jehovah's Witnesses.

Here are just some of the things that Lehi prophesied in 600 BCE.

1. The Babylonian captivity.

   He spake unto them concerning the Jews -- That after they should be destroyed, even that great city Jerusalem, and many be carried away captive into Babylon. 1 Nephi 10:2-3

2. That a Messiah ("or, in other words, the Savior of the world") would come 600 years later.

   Yea, even six hundred years from the time that my father left Jerusalem, a prophet would the Lord God raise up among the Jews -- even a Messiah, or, in other words, a Savior of the world. 1 Nephi 10:4

3. That a prophet would come before the Messiah to "prepare the way of the Lord."

   And he spake also concerning a prophet who should come before the Messiah, to prepare the way of the Lord. -- 1 Nephi 10:7

4. Lehi even know the words that the King James Version translators would put in John the Baptist's mouth 2200 years later.

   Yea, even he should go forth and cry in the wilderness: Prepare ye the way of the Lord, and make his paths straight; for there standeth one among you whom ye know not; and he is mightier than I, whose shoe's latchet I am not worthy to unloose. And much spake my father concerning this thing. 1 Nephi 10:8

5. He knew where John the Baptist would be baptizing. (Bethabara, beyond the Jordan)

   And my father said he should baptize in Bethabara, beyond Jordan; and he also said he should baptize with water; even that he should baptize the Messiah with water. And after he had baptized the Messiah with water, he should behold and bear record that he had baptized the Lamb of God, who should take away the sins of the world. 1 Nephi 10:9-10

6. And that the Messiah (Lehi couldn't quite make out Jesus' name) would be killed by the Jews (who were dwindling in unbelief) and then rise from the dead.

   And it came to pass after my father had spoken these words he spake unto my brethren concerning the gospel which should be preached among the Jews, and also concerning the dwindling of the Jews in unbelief. And after they had slain the Messiah, who should come, and after he had been slain he should rise from the dead, and should make himself manifest, by the Holy Ghost, unto the Gentiles. 1 Nephi 10:11

So Jesus was wrong about John the Baptist. Lehi was the greatest prophet in the world.

Blogging the Book of Mormon

Next episode -- 1 Nephi 11: A spirit shows Nephi all the shit his dad saw

Fundamentalist, born-again Christians love to say that there's only one way to get saved. But if you believe the Bible, there's a lot more than that. Here are the ways that I've found so far. Let me know if I've missed any and I'll add them to the list.

1. Say the right things.

   For by thy words thou shalt be justified. -- Matthew 12:37

2. Do the right things. (Be a do-gooder.)

   And shall come forth; they that have done good, unto the resurrection of life. -- John 5:29

   I the Lord ... give every man according to his ways, and according to the fruit of his doings. -- Jeremiah 17:10

   For we must all appear before the jugment seat of Christ, that each one may receive the things done in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad. -- 2 Corinthians 5:10

3. Believe the right things.

   A man is justified by faith without the deeds of the law. -- Romans 3:28

   Therefore, being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. -- Romans 5:1

   A man is not justified by the works of the law, but by the faith of Jesus Christ. -- Galatians 2:16

   For by grace are ye saved through faith. -- Ephesians 2:8

4. Do and believe the right things.

   Faith, if it hath not works, is dead, being alone. -- James 2:17

5. Work your way to heaven.

   For you render to each one according to his works. -- Psalm 62:12

   For the Son of Man will come in the glory of His Father with His angels, and then He will reward each according to his works. -- Matthew 16.27

   And I saw the dead, small and great, stand before God; and the books were opened: and another book was opened, which is the book of life: and the dead were judged out of those things which were written in the books, according to their works. And the sea gave up the dead which were in it; and death and hell delivered up the dead which were in them: and they were judged every man according to their works. -- Revelation 20:12-13

   Therefore it is no great thing if his ministers also transform themselves into ministers of righteousness, whose end will be according to their works. -- 2 Corinthians 11:15

   The Father, who without partiality judges according to each one's work. -- 1 Peter 1:17

   What doth it profit, my brethren, though a man say he hath faith, and have not works? can faith save him? -- James 2:14, 17, 20, 24, 26

   I will give unto every one of you according to your works. -- Revelation 2:23

6. Burn your work.

   If any man's work shall be burned, he shall suffer loss: but he himself shall be saved; yet so as by fire. -- 1 Corinthians 3:15

7. Be hungry now and never get full.

   Blessed are ye that hunger now: for ye shall be filled. ... Woe unto you that are full! for ye shall hunger. -- Luke 6:21, 24

8. Hunger and thirst after righteousness.

   Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled. -- Matthew 5:6

9. Do what is lawful and right.

   When the wicked man turneth away from his wickedness ... and doeth that which is lawful and right, he shall save his soul. -- Ezekiel 18:27

10. Obey the law of the wise.

    The law of the wise is a fountain of life, to depart from the snares of death. -- Proverbs 13:14

11. Do God's will

    He that doeth the will of God abideth for ever. -- 1 John 2:17

12. Do the will of Jesus' father.

    Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven. -- Matthew 7:21

13. Be a doer of the law.

    Who will render to each one according to his deeds. ... For not the hearers of the law are just in the sight of God, but the doers of the law will be justified. -- Romans 2:6, 13

14. Call on the name of the Lord.

    Whosoever shall call on the name of the Lord shall be saved. -- Acts 2:21, Romans 10:13

15. Call upon God.

    As for me, I will call upon God; and the LORD shall save me. -- Psalm 55:16

16. Trust in the Lord.

    The LORD shall ... save them, because they trust in him. -- Psalm 37:40

17. Get to know God.

    In flaming fire taking vengeance on them that know not God, and that obey not the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ: Who shall be punished with everlasting destruction. -- 2 Thessalonians 1:8-9

18. Wait for him.

    Wait on the LORD, and he shall save thee. -- Proverbs 20:22

    Lo, this is our God; we have waited for him, and he will save us. -- Isaiah 25:9

19. Just look at him.

    Look unto me, and be ye saved. -- Isaiah 45:22

20. Get lost.

    The Son of man is come to save that which was lost. -- Matthew 18:11, Luke 19:10

21. Get lucky.

    I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion. ... Therefore hath he mercy on whom he will have mercy, and whom he will he hardeneth. ... Shall the thing formed say to him that formed it, Why hast thou made me thus? Hath not the potter power over the clay, of the same lump to make one vessel unto honour, and another unto dishonour? What if God, willing to shew his wrath, and to make his power known, endured with much longsuffering the vessels of wrath fitted to destruction: -- Romans 9:15-22

22. Hope.

    For we are saved by hope. -- Romans 8:24

23. Repent.

    Except ye repent, ye shall all likewise perish. -- Luke 13:3, 5

24. Don't be so darned wicked.

    When the wicked man turneth away from his wickedness that he hath committed, and doeth that which is lawful and right, he shall save his soul. -- Ezekiel 18:27

25. Don't offend the little ones.

    But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea. -- Matthew 18:6, Mark 9:14, Luke 17:2

26. Don't be filthy or naughty; receive the engrafted word.

    Lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. -- James 1:21

27. Walk upright.

    Whoso walketh uprightly shall be saved. -- Proverbs 28:18

28. Don't lust.

    Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death. -- James 1:15

29. Bridle your tongue.

    If any man among you seem to be religious, and bridleth not his tongue, but deceiveth his own heart, this man's religion is vain. -- James 1:26

30. Believe in Jesus.

    Whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. -- John 3:16

    He that believeth on the Son hath everlasting life. -- John 3:36

    Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that believeth on me hath everlasting life. -- John 6:47

    Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved. -- Acts 16:31

31. See Jesus and believe in him.

    Every one which seeth the Son, and believeth on him, may have everlasting life: and I will raise him up at the last day. -- John 6:40

32. Confess with your mouth "Jesus is Lord" and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead.

    If thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. -- Romans 10:9

33. Confess Jesus before men.

    Whosoever therefore shall confess me before men, him will I confess also before my Father which is in heaven. -- Matthew 10:32

    Whosoever shall confess me before men, him shall the Son of man also confess before the angels of God. -- Luke 12:8

34. Obey Jesus.

    And [Jesus] being made perfect, he became the author of eternal salvation unto all them that obey him. -- Hebrews 5:9

35. Hear the words of Jesus and believe in whoever sent him.

    He that heareth my word, and believeth on him that sent me, hath everlasting life. -- John 5:24

36. Hear and do the sayings of Jesus.

    Whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock. -- Matthew 7:24

37. Keep Jesus' saying.

    If a man keep my saying, he shall never see death. -- John 8:51

38. Drink Jesus' water.

    Whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life. -- John 4:14

39. Be dead with Jesus.

    It is a faithful saying: For if we be dead with him, we shall also live with him: -- 2 Timothy 2:11

40. Be born again.

    Except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God. -- John 3:3

41. Be born of water and the spirit.

    Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God. -- John 3:5

42. Believe Paul's gospel.

    Moreover, brethren, I declare unto you the gospel which I preached unto you, which also ye have received, and wherein ye stand; By which also ye are saved, if ye keep in memory what I preached unto you, unless ye have believed in vain. 1 Corinthians 15:1-2

43. Believe and be baptized.

    He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved. -- Mark 16:16

44. Just get baptized (you can keep the filth of the flesh).

    Baptism doth also now save us (not the putting away of the filth of the flesh). -- 1 Peter 3:21

45. Have a contrite spirit.

    The LORD ... saveth such as be of a contrite spirit. -- Psalm 34:18

46. Don't be deluded by God.

    God shall send them strong delusion, that they should believe a lie: That they all might be damned. -- 2 Thessalonians 2:11-12

47. Don't be blinded by God.

    Israel hath not obtained that which he seeketh for; but the election hath obtained it, and the rest were blinded. ... God hath given them the spirit of slumber, eyes that they should not see, and ears that they should not hear;) unto this day. ... Let their eyes be darkened, that they may not see. -- Romans 11:7-10

48. Bear good fruit.

    Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire. -- Matthew 7:19, Luke 3:9, 13:9

49. Be grafted in.

    And they also, if they abide not still in unbelief, shall be graffed in: for God is able to graff them in again. -- Romans 11:23

50. Be chosen, not just called.

    For many are called, but few are chosen. -- Matthew 22:14, 20:16

    God hath from the beginning chosen you to salvation. -- 2 Thessalonians 2:13

51. Be perfect.

    Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect. -- Matthew 5:48

52. Be meek.

    When God arose to judgment, to save all the meek of the earth. -- Psalm 76:9

    Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth. -- Matthew 5:5

53. Be washed by the Holy Ghost.

    Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to his mercy he saved us, by the washing of regeneration, and renewing of the Holy Ghost. -- Titus 3:5

54. Get your sins remitted by someone who has received the Holy Ghost. (Or who has been breathed on by Jesus)

    And when he had said this, he breathed on them, and saith unto them, Receive ye the Holy Ghost: Whosesoever sins ye remit, they are remitted unto them; and whose soever sins ye retain, they are retained. -- John 20:22-23

55. Be pure in heart.

    Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God. -- Matthew 5:8

56. Be upright in heart.

    My defence is of God, which saveth the upright in heart. -- Psalm 7:10

57. Be converted and become like a little child.

    Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven. -- Matthew 18:3, Mark 10:15

58. Be a child of the needy.

    he shall save the children of the needy. -- Psalm 72:4

59. Be persecuted for righteousness sake.

    Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness' sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. -- Matthew 5:10

60. Be righteous.

    Righteousness delivereth from death. -- Proverbs 10:2, 11:4

    And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal. -- Matthew 25:46

61. Be more righteous than the scribes and Pharisees.

    Except your righteousness shall exceed the righteousness of the scribes and Pharisees, ye shall in no case enter into the kingdom of heaven. -- Matthew 5:20

62. Forsake all that you have.

    Whosoever he be of you that forsaketh not all that he hath, he cannot be my disciple. -- Luke 14:33

63. Hate your own life.

    The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. John 12:25

64. Lose your life for Christ's sake.

    For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it. -- 10:39, Matthew 16:25, Mark 8:35, Luke 9:24, Luke 17:33

65. Belong to a household that has at least one believer.

    And they said, Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved, and thy house. -- Acts 16:31

    For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. -- 1 Corinthians 7:14

66. Get saved by your spouse.

    For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife? -- 1 Corinthians 7:16

67. Save your whole family by hearing Simon's magic words.

    Call for Simon ... who shall tell thee words, whereby thou and all thy house shall be saved. -- Acts 11:13-14

68. Follow the commandments (at least some of them).

    If you want to enter into life, keep the commandments. He saith unto him, Which? Jesus said, Thou shalt do no murder, Thou shalt not commit adultery, Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not bear false witness, Honour thy father and thy mother: and, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. -- Matthew 19:17-19

    And when he was gone forth into the way, there came one running, and kneeled to him, and asked him, Good Master, what shall I do that I may inherit eternal life? ... Thou knowest the commandments, Do not commit adultery, Do not kill, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Defraud not, Honour thy father and mother. -- Mark 10:17-19

    Blessed are they that do his commandments, that they may have right to the tree of life. -- Revelation 22:14

69. Keep some of the commandments, give all your money to the poor, and follow Jesus.

    And a certain ruler asked him, saying, Good Master, what shall I do to inherit eternal life? ... Thou knowest the commandments, Do not commit adultery, Do not kill, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Honour thy father and thy mother. And he said, All these have I kept from my youth up....thou one thing: sell all that thou hast, and distribute unto the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come, follow me.-- Luke 18:18-22

70. Keep the commandments of God and the faith of Jesus.

    Here is the patience of the saints: here are they that keep the commandments of God, and the faith of Jesus. -- Revelation 14:12

71. Do the commandments and teach others to do them.

    Whosoever therefore shall break one of these least commandments, and shall teach men so, he shall be called the least in the kingdom of heaven: but whosoever shall do and teach them, the same shall be called great in the kingdom of heaven. -- Matthew 5:19

72. Sow to the Spirit.

    He that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting. -- Galatians 6:8

73. Endure to the end.

    He that endureth to the end shall be saved. -- Matthew 10:22, 24:13, Mark 13:13

74. Wait until you die and then have the Mormons baptize you (after you're dead).

    Else what shall they do which are baptized for the dead, if the dead rise not at all? why are they then baptized for the dead? -- 1 Corinthians 15:29

75. Wait until you die and then hear the voice of the Son of God.

    The dead shall hear the voice of the Son of God: and they that hear shall live. -- John 5:25

76. Be faithful unto death.

    Be thou faithful unto death, and I will give thee a crown of life. -- Revelation 2:10

77. Get buried with Jesus by being baptized into death.

    We are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life. For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also in the likeness of his resurrection. -- Romans 6:4-5

78. Always wear a wedding garment.

    And when the king came in to see the guests, he saw there a man which had not on a wedding garment: And he saith unto him, Friend, how camest thou in hither not having a wedding garment? And he was speechless. Then said the king to the servants, Bind him hand and foot, and take him away, and cast him into outer darkness, there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth. -- Matthew 22:11-13

79. Don't get married. (Married people don't go to heaven.)

    They which shall be accounted worthy to obtain that world, and the resurrection from the dead, neither marry, nor are given in marriage. -- Luke 20:35

80. Have lots of babies (and be faithful, charitable, holy, and sober).

    And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety. -- 1 Timothy 2:14-15

81. Become a eunuch for the kingdom of heaven's sake.

    There be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it. -- Matthew 19:12

82. Don't defile yourself with women. (Be a virgin male.)

    ...the hundred and forty and four thousand, which were redeemed from the earth. These are they which were not defiled with women; for they are virgins. -- Revelation 14:4

83. Don't love your family more than Jesus.

    He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. -- Matthew 10:37

84. Abandon your home and family for Jesus' name's sake.

    And every one that hath forsaken houses, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my name's sake, shall receive an hundredfold, and shall inherit everlasting life. -- Matthew 19:29, Mark 10:29-30, Luke 18:29-30

85. Hate your father, mother, wife, children, brothers, sisters, and your own life.

    If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children,and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple. -- Luke 14:26

86. Don't hate your brother.

    Whosoever hateth his brother is a murderer: and ye know that no murderer hath eternal life abiding in him. -- 1 John 3:15

87. Ask your parents to beat you with a rod.

    Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell. -- Proverbs 23:13-14

88. Receive a child in the name of Jesus.

    Whosoever shall receive this child in my name receiveth me: and whosoever shall receive me receiveth him that sent me. -- Luke 9:48a

89. Receive a Christian.

    He that receiveth you receiveth me, and he that receiveth me receiveth him that sent me. -- Matthew 10:40

90. Receive a prophet in the name of a prophet.

    He that receiveth a prophet in the name of a prophet shall receive a prophet's reward. -- Matthew 10:41

91. Receive a righteous man in the name of a righteous man.

    He that receiveth a righteous man in the name of a righteous man shall receive a righteous man's reward. -- Matthew 10:41

92. Receive the gift of eternal life from God through Jesus.

    The gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. -- Romans 6:23

93. Don't despise government or walk after flesh.

    The Lord knoweth how ... to reserve the unjust unto the day of judgment to be punished: But chiefly them that walk after the flesh in the lust of uncleanness, and despise government. -- 2 Peter 2:9-10

94. Don't resist the powers that be.

    Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers. For there is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained of God. Whosoever therefore resisteth the power, resisteth the ordinance of God: and they that resist shall receive to themselves damnation. -- Romans 13:2

95. Wash your wicked heart.

    Wash thine heart from wickedness, that thou mayest be saved. -- Jeremiah 4:14

96. Wash your face and anoint your head when you fast.

    When thou fastest, anoint thine head, and wash thy face; hat thou appear not unto men to fast, but unto thy Father which is in secret: and thy Father, which seeth in secret, shall reward thee openly. -- Matthew 6:17-18

97. Heed yourself and the doctrine.

    Take heed unto thyself, and unto the doctrine; continue in them: for in doing this thou shalt both save thyself, and them that hear thee. -- 1 Timothy 4:16

98. Get saved by Jesus' name.

    Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name [beside's Jesus'] under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved. -- Acts 4:12

99. Get saved by God's name.

    Save me, O God, by thy name. -- Psalm 54:1

100. Get saved by God's shining face.

     Turn us again, O God, and cause thy face to shine; and we shall be saved. -- Psalm 80:3, 7, 19

101. Don't doubt.

     He that doubteth is damned. -- Romans 14:23

102. Don't fall away after you're saved.

     For it is impossible for those who were once enlightened, and have tasted of the heavenly gift, and were made partakers of the Holy Ghost, And have tasted the good word of God, and the powers of the world to come, If they shall fall away, to renew them again unto repentance. -- Hebrews 6:4-6

103. Don't eat your own vomit.

     For it had been better for them not to have known the way of righteousness, than, after they have known it, to turn from the holy commandment delivered unto them. But it is happened unto them according to the true proverb, The dog is turned to his own vomit again; and the sow that was washed to her wallowing in the mire. -- 2 Peter 2:21-22

104. Don't blaspheme the Holy Ghost

     He that shall blaspheme against the Holy Ghost hath never forgiveness, but is in danger of eternal damnation. -- Mark 3:29, Matthew 12:31-32, Luke 12:10

105. Don't let God make you wicked.

     The LORD hath made all things for himself: yea, even the wicked for the day of evil. -- Proverbs 16:4

106. Convert a sinner.

     Let him know, that he which converteth the sinner from the error of his way shall save a soul from death. -- James 5:20

107. Turn yourself over to Satan for the destruction of the flesh so your spirit may be saved. (For fornicators only.)

     It is reported commonly that there is fornication among you ... deliver such an one unto Satan for the destruction of the flesh, that the spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus. -- 1 Corinthians 5:1-5

108. Enter at the strait gate.

     Then said one unto him, Lord, are there few that be saved? And he said unto them, Strive to enter in at the strait gate: for many, I say unto you, will seek to enter in, and shall not be able. -- Luke 13:23-24

109. Enter through the Jesus door.

     I am the door: by me if any man enter in, he shall be saved. -- John 10:9

110. Don't look back.

     Jesus said unto him, No man, having put his hand to the plough, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God. -- Luke 9:62

111. Become an Israeli citizen.

     And so all Israel shall be saved: as it is written, There shall come out of Sion the Deliverer, and shall turn away ungodliness from Jacob. -- Romans 11:26

112. Don't be a Jew.

     But the children of the kingdom shall be cast out into outer darkness: there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth. -- Matthew 8:12

113. Don't be a serpent or a viper, and make sure none of your ancestors were prophet killers.

     Ye are the children of them which killed the prophets ... Ye serpents, ye generation of vipers, how can ye escape the damnation of hell? -- Matthew 23:31-33

114. Don't be an unrighteous fornicator, idolater, adulterer, effeminate, thief, covetous, drunkard, reviler, extortioner, or an abuser of yourself with mankind.

     The unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God. -- 1 Corinthians 6:9-10

115. Don't be fearful, unbelieving, abominable, murdering, whore mongering, a sorcerer, an idolater, or a liar.

     The fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death. -- Revelation 21:8

116. Fear God.

     The fear of the LORD is a fountain of life, to depart from the snares of death. -- Proverbs 14:27

117. Fear God and cry a lot while praying.

     [Jesus] who in the days of his flesh, when he had offered up prayers and supplications with strong crying and tears unto him that was able to save him from death, and was heard in that he feared. -- Hebrews 5:7

118. Don't let your eye become evil.

     But if thine eye be evil, thy whole body shall be full of darkness. If therefore the light that is in thee be darkness, how great is that darkness! -- Matthew 6:23

119. Pluck out your eye if it offends you.

     And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. -- Matthew 5:29-30, 18:8-9, Mark 9:43-49

120. Cut off your right hand if it offends you.

     If thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. -- Matthew 5:29-30, 18:8-9, Mark 9:43-49

121. Don't let your left hand know what your right hand is doing.

     Let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth: That thine alms may be in secret: and thy Father which seeth in secret himself shall reward thee openly. -- Matthew 6:4-5

122. Be ordained to eternal life.

     As many as were ordained to eternal life believed. -- Acts 13:48

123. Be drawn by by the Father.

     No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws him, and I will raise him up at the last day. John 6:44

124. Be elected by God before you're born.

     For the children being not yet born, neither having done any good or evil, that the purpose of God according to election might stand, not of works, but of him that calleth. -- Romans 9:11

     Knowing, brethren beloved, your election of God. -- 1 Thessalonians 1:4

125. Don't be ashamed of Jesus.

     Whosoever therefore shall be ashamed of me and of my words in this adulterous and sinful generation; of him also shall the Son of man be ashamed, when he cometh in the glory of his Father with the holy angels. -- Mark 8:38, Luke 9:26

126. Don't let anyone see you do anything good.

     Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven. -- Matthew 6:1

127. Don't let anyone say anything nice about you.

     Woe unto you, when all men shall speak well of you! -- Luke 6:26

128. Don't love the world or the things in it.

     Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him. -- 1 John 2:15

129. Don't be a friend to the world.

     Whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God. -- James 4:4

130. Be given by the Father and come to the Son.

     All that the Father giveth me shall come to me; and him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out. -- John 6:37

131. Come to the Father by Jesus.

     Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me. -- John 14:6

132. Be given by God to Jesus (or whatever).

     These words spake Jesus, and lifted up his eyes to heaven, and said, Father, the hour is come; glorify thy Son, that thy Son also may glorify thee: As thou hast given him power over all flesh, that he should give eternal life to as many as thou hast given him. -- John 17:1-2

133. Be saved by Jesus' life (if you're a friend) or by his death if your an enemy).

     For if, when we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, being reconciled, we shall be saved by his life. -- Romans 5:10

134. Don't get circumcised.

     Behold, I Paul say unto you, that if ye be circumcised, Christ shall profit you nothing ... ye are fallen from grace. -- Galatians 5:2-4

135. Be dead in your sins and uncircumcised flesh, and then let God quicken you with Christ.

     But God ... when we were dead in sins, hath quickened us together with Christ. -- Ephesians 2:4-5

136. Be chosen from the beginning.

     But we are bound to give thanks alway to God for you, brethren beloved of the Lord, because God hath from the beginning chosen you to salvation. -- 2 Thessalonians 2:13

     And you, being dead in your sins and the uncircumcision of your flesh, hath he quickened together with him, having forgiven you all trespasses. -- Colossians 2:13

137. Be predestinated by God.

     For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate ... Moreover whom he did predestinate, them he also called: and whom he called, them he also justified: and whom he justified, them he also glorified. -- Romans 8:29-30

     He hath chosen us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before him in love. Having predestinated us ... according to the good pleasure of his will. -- Ephesians 1:4-5

138. Be poor, not rich.

     He shall ... save the souls of the needy. -- Psalm 72:13

     Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. --Matthew 5:3

     Blessed be ye poor: for yours is the kingdom of God. ... But woe unto you that are rich! for ye have received your consolation. -- Luke 6:20, 24

     Verily I say unto you, That a rich man shall hardly enter into the kingdom of heaven. And again I say unto you, It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God. -- Matthew 19:23-24

     But woe unto you that are rich! for ye have received your consolation. -- Luke 6:24

     Ye rich men, weep and howl for your miseries that shall come upon you. -- James 5:1

139. Be poor in this world, be rich in faith, and love God.

     Hath not God chosen the poor of this world rich in faith, and heirs of the kingdom which he hath promised to them that love him? -- James 2:5

140. Be sad.

     Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted. -- Matthew 5:4

141. Cry a lot.

     Then they cried unto the LORD in their trouble, and he saved them. -- Psalm 107:13, 19

     Blessed are ye that weep now: for ye shall laugh. -- Luke 6:21

142. Don't laugh.

     Woe unto you that laugh now! for ye shall mourn and weep. -- Luke 6:25

143. Be last.

     But many that are first shall be last; and the last shall be first. -- Matthew 19:30, 20:16; Mark 10:31; Luke 13:30

144. Be least.

     He that is least among you all, the same shall be great. -- Luke 9:48b

145. Eat the bread that comes down from heaven.

     This is the bread which cometh down from heaven, that a man may eat thereof, and not die. -- John 6:50

146. Eat Jesus' body and drink his blood.

     Except ye eat the flesh of the Son of man, and drink his blood, ye have no life in you. Whoso eateth my flesh, and drinketh my blood, hath eternal life; and I will raise him up at the last day. -- John 6:53-54

147. Have faith in Jesus' blood.

     God hath set forth to be a propitiation through faith in his blood. -- Romans 3:25

148. Be saved and justified by Jesus' blood.

     Much more then, being now justified by his blood, we shall be saved from wrath through him. -- Romans 5:9

149. Make people revile you, persecute you, hate you, avoid you, say bad things about you, and call you names for Jesus' sake.

     Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake. -- Matthew 5:11

     Blessed are ye, when men shall hate you, and when they shall separate you from their company, and shall reproach you, and cast out your name as evil, for the Son of man's sake. Rejoice ye in that day, and leap for joy: for, behold, your reward is great in heaven. -- Luke 6:22-23

150. Follow peace and holiness with all men

     Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord. -- Hebrews 12:14

151. Believe in the foolishness of preaching.

     For after that in the wisdom of God the world by wisdom knew not God, it pleased God by the foolishness of preaching to save them that believe. -- 1 Corinthians 1:21

152. Be innocent.

     He [God] shall deliver the island of the innocent. -- Job 22:30

153. Give a cup of water to a Christian.

     For whosoever shall give you a cup of water to drink in my name, because ye belong to Christ, verily I say unto you, he shall not lose his reward. -- Matthew 10:42, Mark 9:41

154. Love Christians.

     We know that we have passed from death unto life, because we love the brethren. He that loveth not his brother abideth in death. -- 1 John 3:14

155. Love your enemies, do good to them, and give them lots of money.

     But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. -- Luke 6:35, Matthew 5:44-45

156. Love God and your neighbor.

     He said unto him, What is written in the law? how readest thou? And he answering said, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbour as thyself. And he said unto him, Thou hast answered right: this do, and thou shalt live. -- Luke 10:26-28

157. Be a peacemaker.

     Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God. -- Matthew 5:9

158. Feed the hungry, give drink to the thirsty, take in strangers, clothe the naked, visit the sick and imprisoned.

     Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in: Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me. -- Matthew 25:34-36

159. Be merciful.

     Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy. -- Matthew 5:7

     For he shall have judgment without mercy, that hath shewed no mercy; and mercy rejoiceth against judgment. -- James 2:13

160. Forgive people.

     For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. Matthew 6:14

161. Don't judge.

     Judge not, and ye shall not be judged. -- Matthew 7:1, Luke 6:37

162. Be humble.

     He [God] shall save the humble person. -- Job 22:29

     Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is greatest in the kingdom of heaven. -- Matthew 7:1

163. Love the truth.

     And with all deceivableness of unrighteousness in them that perish; because they received not the love of the truth, that they might be saved. -- 2 Thessalonians 2:10

164. Don't pray in public.

     And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. -- Matthew 6:5

165. Be saved by other people's unbelief.
     (You can have some of mine; I've got plenty.)

     For as ye in times past have not believed God, yet have now obtained mercy through their unbelief. -- Romans 11:30

166. Just ask.

     Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened. -- Matthew 7:7-8

167. All you need is love.

     Love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God. -- 1 John 4:7

After Nephi and his brothers got back from their women-hunting mission to Jerusalem, it came to pass that Lehi had another dream -- that is he dreamed a dream; or, in other words, he had seen a vision.

And it came to pass that while my father tarried in the wilderness he spake unto us, saying: Behold, I have dreamed a dream; or, in other words, I have seen a vision.1 Nephi 8:2

(The dream that Lehi had was nearly identical to Joseph Smith, Sr.'s dream 2400 years later, before Joseph Smith, Jr. "translated" the Book of Mormon. But I'm sure that was just a coincidence.)

Lehi dreamed about tree with fruit that could make you happy if you ate it (or smoked it?).

And it came to pass that I beheld a tree, whose fruit was desirable to make one happy.1 Nephi 8:10

Lehi partook of the fruit thereof, and it was the sweetest thing he'd ever tasted, and was whiter than anything he'd ever seen before. (Being white is the best thing a thing can be in the Book of Mormon.)

And it came to pass that I did go forth and partake of the fruit thereof; and I beheld that it was most sweet, above all that I ever before tasted. Yea, and I beheld that the fruit thereof was white, to exceed all the whiteness that I had ever seen. 1 Nephi 8:11

And it made him exceedingly happy, happier than he'd ever been before. He was so darned happy he could hardly stand it. So he wanted his family to eat from the happy tree, too.

And as I partook of the fruit thereof it filled my soul with exceedingly great joy; wherefore, I began to be desirous that my family should partake of it also; for I knew that it was desirable above all other fruit.1 Nephi 8:12

So Lehi cast his eyes round about until he discovered his family.

And as I cast my eyes round about, that perhaps I might discover my family also, I beheld a river of water; and it ran along, and it was near the tree of which I was partaking the fruit.1 Nephi 8:13

Lehi told his family to eat the happy fruit, and the good members of his family (Nephi, Sariah, and Sam) ate it.

And ... I beheld your mother Sariah, and Sam, and Nephi; and they stood as if they knew not whither they should go. And it came to pass that I beckoned unto them; and I also did say unto them with a loud voice that they should come unto me, and partake of the fruit, which was desirable above all other fruit. And it came to pass that they did come unto me and partake of the fruit also. 1 Nephi 8:14-16

After the good guys ate the good fruit, Lehi cast his eyes about again until he saw Laman and Lemuel. He told them to eat the fruit, but they wouldn't do it (because they were bad).

And it came to pass that I was desirous that Laman and Lemuel should come and partake of the fruit also; wherefore, I cast mine eyes towards the head of the river, that perhaps I might see them. And it came to pass that I saw them, but they would not come unto me and partake of the fruit. 1 Nephi 8:17-18

Lehi saw an iron rod along the side of the river that people clung to as they traveled towards the happy tree.

In the background there was a mist of darkness; yea, even an exceedingly great mist of darkness that lots of people got lost in.

And it came to pass that there arose a mist of darkness; yea, even an exceedingly great mist of darkness, insomuch that they who had commenced in the path did lose their way, that they wandered off and were lost. 1 Nephi 8:23

But some managed to find the happy-fruit tree by hanging on to the rod of iron.

And it came to pass that I beheld others pressing forward, and they came forth and caught hold of the end of the rod of iron; and they did press forward through the mist of darkness, clinging to the rod of iron, even until they did come forth and partake of the fruit of the tree.1 Nephi 8:24

But after partaking of the happy fruit, the people cast their eyes about like they were ashamed or something.

And after they had partaken of the fruit of the tree they did cast their eyes about as if they were ashamed. 1 Nephi 8:25

Then Lehi cast his eyes about again and saw a big building floating in the air.

And I also cast my eyes round about, and beheld, on the other side of the river of water, a great and spacious building; and it stood as it were in the air, high above the earth.1 Nephi 8:26

The building was filled with people that were looking down and pointing and laughing at the people eating the happy fruit.

And it was filled with people, both old and young, both male and female; and their manner of dress was exceedingly fine; and they were in the attitude of mocking and pointing their fingers towards those who had come at and were partaking of the fruit.1 Nephi 8:27

Then the people who were ashamed after eating the happy fruit crawled off into the darkness and got lost.

And after they had tasted of the fruit they were ashamed, because of those that were scoffing at them; and they fell away into forbidden paths and were lost.1 Nephi 8:

Some of the ashamed fruit-eaters made it to the big building, but others drowned.

And he also saw other multitudes feeling their way towards that great and spacious building. And it came to pass that many were drowned in the depths of the fountain; and many were lost from his view, wandering in strange roads. 1 Nephi 8:31-32

Those that made it into the big building in the sky began pointing the finger of scorn at the happy fruit eaters below.

And great was the multitude that did enter into that strange building. And after they did enter into that building they did point the finger of scorn at me and those that were partaking of the fruit also; but we heeded them not. 1 Nephi 8:33

Here's what the whole thing looked like.

Blogging the Book of Mormon

Next episode -- 1 Nephi 9: Nephi names his plates