Author Archive for possum_momma

Still here

The kids and I had a wonderful Christmas break. :) We also managed to squeeze in a trip to the LA Zoo. Though we only lasted two hours (too many people, weird weather), we had a fun time. It's always entertaining to listen to P3 and P4 comment on the animals' behavior.

I'm still posting mostly to facebook, but I'll try to get back to posting here more often.


Observed

My parents received the following flier on their door last week. The text had been reproduced in full (with the exception of the name and place of the church).

"Calling all responsible Christians. Please meet at xxxxxxxxx Church, located at **** ************ Road, on Friday, October 30, 6:00pm for a symposium on the true meaning of Halloween and Proposition 8..."

I love how they're throwing a "symposium" on gay marriage and Halloween, as if the two are in any way related, on the Eve of Halloween. If the kids and I didn't have plans, I'd go just to be a fly on the wall. Think I could pass for a "responsible Christian"?


Housekeeping

Just for those who haven't found me, yet. I am on facebook. I'm not facebook proficient enough to start a pmomma page, but that might be on the horizon. For those who know my name and want to add me, that would be great.

The possums are doing well. P3 just turned 7 yesterday. It's hard to believe that when I started this blog, she was just a baby.

I ran into Jack Jackyll the other day and he's looking pretty good. Maybe I can convince him to start up the podcast?

The ACA has a cool interview with PZ Meyers available at their website. Check it out!

How are all of you? I miss being able to write for you and chat with you. Soon. Hopefully this will soon be back to a new normal.


Science in schools

PZ has an interesting article on his site. It contains a map of the US, where each state is given a score based on it's public education commitment to evolutionary biology (among other things). California gets an A. This actually mildly surprises me. I guess it's because of where I live, in particular, but I see a backlash to this every day. Just this week, I had a discussion with another class-mom that illustrates this backlash.

I mentioned that I liked our middle school science teacher because she truly wants the children to understand biology. She really strives to get the kids involved in teh scientific method. This other room-mom, however, didn't take my enthusiasm for the teacher as a positive thing. She was worried. I asked why she was worried and she explained that she was glad she'd told her son, on the first day, to remember that he should "give the answer the teacher wants at school, but know in (his) heart the "real answer"".

I have to say that the discussion kind of petered out after that. I mean, what do you say from that point on that won't end up in meritless, go-nowhere back-and-forth?

Sadly, in this "A" state, that's a common sentiment in these parts. I don't get it. I suppose I don't have to.

Back in the saddle.

Does anyone read here anymore?

Congrats

Congratulations are in order for my friend Berlzebub and his family.

He's the proud new papa of two beautiful baby girls.



Pharyngula -v- Ham

This post at PZ Meyers' place is gold.
The comments are a delicious bonus. Some of them have left my side aching and I'd like to share a few of my favorites...

Rev. Big Dump Chimp: "Now that we've brought out the sharp poking stick, when do we use the smashing rock?"

Lose the Woo: "...but since the whole "museum" is scientifically vacuous..."

Ham: But its got displays...really neat ones too. They proclaim the truth of the bible plain as day for everyone to see!

When Dinkum asks why Ham won't link to PZ, Warren says...They'll just drift over on floating mats of vegetation.

Humanistic Jones: As Chef taught us, if someone serves you and then you serve them back, then it's on. While PZ has twice served Ham today, does anything from Ham count for the technical definition of serving?




Camp Quest

P1 and I are back from camp. Let me first say that the setting was beautiful. I love California Gold Country and this was no disappointment. The Yuba River looked so inviting. The trees and vegetation were green and dense. The history jumped out at you around every bend - culminating in P1 and I discovering one of the earliest cemeteries in northern California. I could've wandered around all day, but we had to get to the hotel room in Sac.

Our original plan was to stay with the kind folks at Quest/Ross on Saturday night. Unfortunately, P1 was (understandably) ready to be headed home. She wasn't feeling 100% and the cabin wasn't well ventilated. Next year - we're bringing fans! So sadly, we decided to head into old town Sacramento for the night. Where, one we got a cool room, a decent mattress, and a meal, she was feeling much better.

To Chris Lindstrom, thank you for putting on such an amazing camp! You asked us to think of things to do to make next year better and I have a list of things I'd like to help with. Let's get together and talk! Seriously! It was nice meeting you. OH! You can just call me about the check and we'll get that straightened.

To Terri = thank you for being P1's second mom. I heard so much about you on the way home!
To Brian = We will HAVE TO get together. Thank you for entertaining my poker shark for an evening. ;)
To Matt = You've done it! Great job! Would love to keep in contact with you.

Let's organize some central valley meet-ups for Quest!

http://picasaweb.google.com/bedellcl/Quest?authkey=Gv1sRgCL7F0tP21o-szAE#

more later..

Quest West

The Sacramenton Bee has an interesting article on Camp Quest West.

I think the article gives the wrong impression of this camp. It's not just "an atheist camp". It's so much more than that. It's a camp for free-thought, science, logic, morality, ethics, and free expression. I'm curious why the author didn't stress those characteristics and stated missions of the camp?

If you really want an interesting read, check out the comments on the article.

Camp

Here are some pics I took yesterday.

Lev

Thanks, Lev! I normally hate using blogs as messengers, but I didn't have another contact method. :)

The Unit


I read a neat book called "The Unit", by Ninni Holmqvist. I say "neat" because it has an Orwellian, Handmaid's Tale sort of skeevy-ness about it. The book is set in the future, though not the far off future. Perhaps a generation forward. The Party (government) sets up a system in which "the dispensable" (childless women over fifty and childless men over sixty) are placed into a Reserve Bank Housing Unit. All of their needs are met (food, clothing, shopping, movies, activities, hobbies, housing, and medical). In fact, their needs are met so well that most live more affluent lives in the unit than they did outside. This is partly because the government has turned the country into a purely economically driven economy where families are, supposedly, the most precious resource. They did this to ensure that the GDP would stay on an upward trend. Mothers and fathers have to split maternity leave. There's a law stating moms must return to work and the government subsidizes child care from six months on. Those who do not have children, as I said, are dispensable. They are seen as a drain on the economy when they reach fifty, under the assumption that they won't be working much longer and have no one to care for. They go to the Unit. The Unit sounds like a pretty cool place (having all your needs met and all) until you understand the caveat. While you're being pampered and have every available comfort, you also are used for biological and medical experiments. You're also used as a donor. At any time, you might have a cornea or kidney or other organ taken. These organs are given to the "needed people" of society. Ultimately, after a few years, you make your "final donation" (heart or lungs). But, what happens when a dispensable gets pregnant (because, yes,...you can hook-up as much as you want in the Unit)? The powers that be assume women over fifty are pre-menopausal or menopausal, so this is a rare occurence. But, what if? This is what happens to the book's protagonist. I won't ruin the ending, but it's unexpected and thought provoking. I highly recommend checking this out! I don't like fiction and I blew through this in a day. Let me know what you think.

Coming up.

*A book review.
* Update and status report.
*Rant on talk radio.

How are you doing?

Goals

This post is in the stream of consciousness tradition (wherein I will just keep writing whatever it is that enters my head, to be refined/defined later).

I need a goal. I just need some 1-2 year event to shoot for. So, what do I do then? I want to hike. I want to get back to that person I used to be before love/marriage/family took me to mommy-town. I want to free climb El Cap and spent a day getting lost in some backwoods Sierra creek. I want to meet people on the trail and learn about them. I want this part of me back so desperately and I have very little direction as to how to make that happen.

I want to hike the AT (Appalachian Trail) in March of 2011. I need to decide how that would be physically possible and what I can do to make it happen. How can a disabled person do it? How can I afford it? What about the kids? All of these questions need answering. But, I do have enough "faith" think they are answerable.

Questions? Queries? Want to call me a whack-job and ask why? Do it here. Thanks.

Pickychicky

Pickychicky commented and asked for an update. She's right. An update is more than overdue.

I'm still gun-shy about posting too much on this blog. Certain people are eager to use anything said as ammunition. Apparently, there are friends of mine who still get flack and weekly inquiries about my existence. (frown)

The kids and I are plugging along. I still have majority custody of them and contrary to what's been posted elsewhere, there's been no justification for changing that.

I won't talk about Pdaddy. He is an individual in his own rite and should speak for himself. I don't understand his choices or his behavior. I can only speak for myself. I'm adjusting. It's really hard adjusting to life as a single mother of four after being with your best friend/life partner for almost a decade. I miss Mike: I can't lie. It's strange not having him around to talk to and I miss the relationship I thought we had. There are times when I really wish he was home. Then I realize that his actions prohibit the trust that's necessary in having that sort of relationship. I will say he's been very helpful with my latest hiccup.

I hurt my knee pretty badly. It's made life complicated.

The kids are adjusting. P2 is such a rock. I really value his contributions to our new family. He's been busy with drumline and scouts. P1 is a fourteen year old girl - focused on school and planning for the future. Having a teenage girl is an experience. P3 is dealing with the situation in the best way she can. She, rightfully and understandably, misses what was. P4 is my daily reminder that childhood is a gift and he takes up most of my attention. We're busy with creating new schedules and enjoying one another.

I've been trying to keep up with my friends online. It's difficult. There just aren't enough hours in a day. If you want to call me, that's probably an easier way to contact me.

I hope to get back into blogging (late this summer). I need to take care of other priorities first. I miss you all terribly. I hope you all know that. *hugs*

Labor and Delivery

During my blog black-out, I've been conversing with a lady who is set to deliver her first baby any day now. One thing that keeps coming up in our discussion is pain relief during labor. I've had four deliveries resulting in live births (as near to term as I could get). The one common thread, in four very different stories, is that labor hurts. It hurts like hell. The only difference is the manner and location of the pain.

I do know some women who've done pain free births. One such woman reads this blog (Amy) and would probably share her experience with you. Another woman named Erin had a great birth story you should read (maybe she'll pop up and share a link). I know women who've birthed just about everywhere and I hope they'll join the discussion to share what they know.

What I do know is that any religious claim to pain is bull. It's true that the most ardent fundy will claim that labor pain is a woman's duty. But, to them I ask...what about the Biblical promise to Adam. God knows that, to create another, Adam must be put through great pain. To remove the rib from Adam to make Eve, Adam will be subjected to great pain. What does God do? He puts Adam to sleep. Read that again. God puts Adam to asleep to avoid the pain of bringing forth a new human being. Where, exactly, is the religious objection to relieving pain in child birth? I say that they don't have a leg to stand on. If God exists, he/she/it certainly expects us to use our wisdom to alleviate human suffering. If he doesn't, then I expect outrage over the women who get pregnant by non-religious piety in IVF clinics all across the nation. The religious right doesn't seem to object to the interference of man in that case.

Moving along - take the meds if you want them! Don't allow a cleric wearing a dog collar (especially an unmarried cleric) tell you that your fear of pain is proof of your lack of will. Dry that out and you could fertilize a golf course.

"What To Expect", while a wonderful series, has screwed an entire generation of women into thinking that a book can adequately prepare you for what labor will be like for you. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAhahahah-ha-itty-haha! There's nothing that will prepare you for your birth. It is what is it is. Go with it.

Don't buy into the catty, b/s religious crap...
Scientology says "don't scream" or you'll imprint chaos and negativity onto the baby. Let me just roll the ole' oculars. *pause* I've seen men grunt while taking a six oz. shite on the toilet. I've seen a burly, manly-man groan when hefting a ten pound bag of lawn fertilizer up a slight incline. The truth is that humans react to pain by engaging in some noise making. Can you imagine what it would be like to watch a martial arts master blast through an I-block without his "Heeeyaaaaaaaa!"? Shoot. Go out in a blaze of glory, friend! You don't have to swear Kathy Griffin style, but a few "shits" and growls won't damn you to hell. I'd be willing to bet most people can't hoe a garden without a few oral celebrations or utterances...you think it's reasonable to pass a seven pound bundle of bone and muscle through your coocher without making a peep. Me thinks you're a bit to hard on yourself.

Don't fear the pain relief. No one is going to stand at the door to the hospital and demand a drug test before you leave. There's no special parking spot for "morphine moms" or "epidural wussies" at Baby'sRUs. Within ten minutes after birth, I'll guarantee you that no one gives two shoots about what you had to take to deal with your ordeal. They'll be too busy counting toes and asking about the consistency of meconium.

I've had the Douala's. I think they're handy. They're not healing incarnate and they're not a substitute for a husband, mate, or good friend who loves you. But, they'll do. Their sole duty is to hold you hand and cheer lead you on without actually involving Mylar and spanky pants. They move your favorite pillow and give you scalpel massages, totally understanding that that little hair on your head is a mental barrier for your baby's entrance to the world. It's okay!

You're right. Pain is generally there for a reason. That doesn't mean we accept that it needs to hand out for another eight hours to re-remind us that there's a big, wiggly barrel load of baby eyeing your snatch as it's emergency exit. I have yet to hear of a twenty year old who approaches his mom, joint in hand, who says "Yo, Madre! That teensy hit of morphine you hand when I was less than born totally primed my receptors for opiates. I remember how great it felt to be wasted AND wonder why someone was shoving my face into gazongas I'd never seen before." It just doesn't happen. It's no big deal. You'll make mistakes that really count later.

Just sleep well, great white mother. You won't be pregnant forever. :)

What’s new?

Questions from the ole' inbox.

Did you stop blogging? I miss your posts.
Short answer? No. Long answer. I have too much else going on to put blogging on any priority list. I know there are some rumors and innuendo going around that might deserve responses, but I don't have the time, nor the inclination. Information is on a need to know basis temporarily. I have four amazing, beautiful kids who have always come first and that won't be changing any time soon. I know most of you understand.

What did you think of Obama's speech?

I assume you mean the inauguration? I don't know. It was pretty typical. I'm excited about change for the country. I'm normally not a change for change's sake person but this change of power feels right. It's time for new ideas and strategies. It's time to regroup on policy and I think Obama will institute that reflection. I think he'll change what needs changing while respecting the things that are working.

Did any of your kids bite? What did you do because I'm out of ideas?

Every kid but P1 went through a biting phase. My response depended on the kid with the chomping habit. I think you have to really ask "why?" they're biting and work from there. Is it frustration? Is it pain from teething? Is it anger? Is it to cause pain to the bite'ee? Is the kid bored or do they want attention? Send me a private e-mail explaining the situation or comment here. I can't promise a speedy response but I'll look for it. Mostly just know that biting is common in preschoolers/toddlers. You don't see many ten year old kids who make a habit of biting so I promise you can handle this.

Where do you get your art supplies? You told me before and I can't find the link. Is it tempera that kids use for painting?

www.discountschoolsupplies.com is a good place for kids stuff. If you can't find it there, try Classrooms Direct. Tempera is for every day painting, on cheap paper. If you want to paint on plastic/clay/wood, I suggest acrylics at Michael's Crafts. Watercolor is another cheap alternative and easy to clean up, but it only works on non-glossy, woven paper. It runs on newsprint. E-mail me.

Where do you find baby corn?

In a can at the market. Try the canned veggie section.

One pan, Late Night

I swear, the best cooking I do is when I'm trying to throw something together with five minutes on the clock. I wanted some thing warm and pasta-y without getting spaghetti meetballs or whatever. So, I put some shell macaroni to boil in one pot. I chopped up some left over olives and walnuts until they resembled a cracker spread. Meanwhile, I took some bacon left over from breakfast and nuked them until they were crispy. Opened a can of artichoke hearts in crushed a few of those. Threw in two slices of provo and a little blue cheese. Mix together and enjoy! I'm in heaven. Forgot to write the spices I used: bay leaves, basil, garlic, cumin.