Rising prices at the gas pumps, and higher energy costs in general have resulted in the newest generation of hybrid cars.

Last week at a dinner party people were discussing the election. Of course they were, what the hell else does anyone ever talk about these days. I am a firm believer that since we, as humans, have the ability to form opinions we should give voice to them, so I did. I stated my belief that for a presidential election to be fair, we need to do away with delegates and that the primaries should be held on the same day in all states. Scattering the primaries as we do, allows the media to take too much control of the outcome, and it does not give every candidate who enters the race the same chance, nor does it give all Americans the choice to vote for all candidates who have tossed their hats into the ring.

I’ve ranted about the electoral college before (I got my degree from the electoral college) and here I go again. At the dinner party several people agreed with me, but one, seemingly intelligent, woman argued (as someone always does when this discussion comes up) that we must have the electoral college or small states will be under-represented. That’s just so much horse shit it makes me want to scream! If state A has five thousand people and state B has five million people and all of them vote, and the votes are fairly counted we end up with five million five thousand votes..what’s the freakin’ problem? The president is supposed to be chosen by the people (one nation), not states.

Another silly argument that comes up on occasion, is if we don’t have the electoral college people can vote for whoever they want. So, what’s the problem? It’s our country, our president. It’s not as if eliminating electors means eliminating the rules entirely. We would still be able to choose only from those candidates who are on the ballot. And I suspect one primary, one election, one vote per person would take a much smaller chunk of taxpayer change.

In state and local elections we have a direct vote, no one worries that small counties may be unfairly represented. The only way to fairly and honestly choose a president is one person one vote. Pledged delegates, as I understand it, are under no legal obligation to vote for their candidate. How do we know that many of the so called democratic delegates are not really under-cover republicans that have joined, worked, or volunteered for the DNC to earn delegate status so that when it comes time to vote in the presidential election they can throw their votes to the republican nominee or vise versa?

The present system is needlessly complex and I believe the reason they keep it so is because it makes it that much easier to manipulate an election. I’m considering not voting anymore as it is probably a waste of time and hope, and I wish I had the power to convince all Americans to boycott presidential elections until we elect the head honcho by popular vote. Sadly I suspect that even if I could accomplish such a boycott the result would be the same as if everyone voted.

I am completely and utterly disillusioned, outraged, frustrated, and feeling powerless to do a damn thing except rant and hope that by doing so I can make people think.

Ironically I saw a bumper sticker the other day that said, “It’s not about who votes, but who counts the votes.”

For a very long time I have thought I’d like to make a George Bush pinata. Like many of my ideas, this one never made it beyond the confines of my cranium. The other day a friend mentioned he would like a life sized, water proof decal of Bush’s face to put in his toilet. I figured by now these things and more have probably been done so a googlin’ I went. Here are some fun products you might like for a party, to give as gifts, or just for your own personal gratification.

First i found a couple of pinatas, neither is realistic enough for my own sadistic satisfaction. The first is a face only, and can be found here.

I found this next one on Diary of a Diary of a Bad Housewife.

When I searched for my friend’s decal I found something even better. The George Bush Toilet brush.

Who wouldn’t want to stick dumbya’s head in the toilet? I bet if I had this my toilet would be cleaned several times a day, probably after each use. An added benefit would probably be that even guests using your bathroom would clean your toilet after seeing this nifty little tool.

I also found a life sized cardboard cutout of W, and I wondered what could that be used for…

… immediately a new version of an old game came to mind, pin the brain on the moron. It would be played just like pin the tail on the donkey, except instead of a donkey we would use an ass (ok so that part would be the same) and instead of a tail we would have a cardboard cutout of a brain. The contestant is blindfolded and spun around, then tries to pin the brain on the correct part of the cutout. Like the original game, the player only wins if he or she pins the brain to the ass’s ass.

I’m sure this cutout has many fun uses, and if you have some ideas, I’d love to hear them.

The other day a friend emailed the following joke:

FINALLY, SOMEONE HAS CLEARED THIS UP FOR ME…. For centuries, Hindu women have worn a dot on their foreheads. Most of us have naively thought this was connected with marriage or religion, but the Indian Embassy in Washington , DC has recently revealed the true story…

When a Hindu woman gets married, she brings a dowry into the union. On her wedding night, the husband scratches off the dot to see whether he has won a convenience store, a gas station, a donut shop or a motel in the United States . If nothing is there, he must take a job in India answering telephones giving technical advice.

Now you know.

As I was reading the second paragraph I thought how typically stereotypical…until I got to the line about answering telephones which made me laugh out loud. I received this joke the same day the following comment was posted on one of my older rants in which I suggest the country name be changed from India to Customer Service.

If India changes its name to Customer Service, the US of A should change its name to the United States of stoned XBOX-playing McDonalds meat-flippers and crack whores infested with genital herpes working the corner of Main Street to pay for their Customer Support call to India. Comment by Arunabh Das Sharma

This was not the only person, with an Indian sounding name, who took offense at what I wrote. If you read the post you will see that I am blasting customer service in general, some of it in the good old U.S.A. My comments on the quality (lack thereof) of Indian customer service and tech support personnel are based on my personal experience and more often that not, it sucks. Unlike Arunabh Das Sharma I am not speaking ill of Indian people in general, I am talking about how poorly equipped individuals are (the few left here and abroad) to provide the service for which they are being paid. My remarks are more a comment on corporate America bilking its consumers by selling expensive products and providing sub-standard support once they have our money in their greedy pockets. I blame the American companies who turn this function over to Indian call centers and don’t investigate or monitor the employee qualifications, level of training, or the quality of service these centers provide.

Outsourcing is cheaper than hiring and providing proper training for locals, a practice I find despicable. With more and more jobs being outsourced and the maquiladoras (thanks NAFTA) more and more Americans are left without jobs. So I would ask these corporations; who will be left with enough money to buy your products and do you even care? Because the bottom line really is that as a result of cheap foreign labor, corporate profits rise, or more likely the obscenely huge salaries of greedy top executives. So if your company goes belly up (and for some strange reason the government doesn’t bail you out) no biggie. You’ve had a good run as CEO making millions every year (not including the perks) so I’m guessing you’re set for life. What a pity you have to see those dirty American peasants in the streets, scrambling to meet the basic needs of their families, from your stretch limo on the way to your private jet.

It is only April 7th and I have just finished, filed, and paid my taxes.  This may cause great concern for my welfare among my friends, family, and the IRS as they know it has been my M.O. to do nothing but fret about the fact that I need to file my taxes until about October 14th (the end of the extension period).  Even I am baffled at how I managed to pull this off.  Perhaps I will wake up and discover it was all a crazy dream.

Now for that good news I promised, about the economy.  I worked very little last year and made a pitifully small amount of money.   When I arrived at the bottom line on my aforementioned tax returns I had a balance due of $603.00. However, my pitiful income qualified me for a $300.00 earned income credit reducing my obligation to $303.00.  TurboTax informed me that I will receive an economic stimulus rebate of $300.00.  I paid my taxes with a credit card for which I was charged a $7.50 convenience fee, bringing my total outlay to $310.50.  I’m getting a $25 refund from the state.  Add to that my 300.00 rebate, I am now ahead by a grand total of $14.50 with which I promise, my fellow Americans, to go forth and stimulate the economy…so you can put away all your fears about the looming recession.

Let the spending frenzy begin!  Oh, where do I start?

A very dear friend is among those spreading the word to Boycott the Olympics in Beijing because of the situation in Tibet. In my humble opinion I doubt that a boycott of the Olympics, even one of massive proportions, would affect any change in the plight of Tibet.

The Olympic games are a huge deal for many people regardless of their world view. This is especially true for the athletes who spend a lifetime of hard work just to have a chance to compete in these games. Add to this their families, fans, and die hard Olympic lovers and there will probably not be too many people willing to join in the boycott.

I have seen pictures, read news stories, and listened to personal accounts of people who have recently spent time in China. Based on this I am of the opinion that the games should not be boycotted. Why not? Two reasons. First I don’t think the government of any country will take an official stand at the risk of alienating China. But mostly I think the games should go on because this will give the world a chance to see China, particularly Beijing, for what it really is. When I refer to China, I of course refer to the Chinese government. I would no more judge people living in China based on their government than I want the rest of the world to judge me based on the Bush Administration.

A woman I spoke with told me that the air in Beijing is so polluted you could cut it with a knife and that people are coughing and actually spitting mucous on the streets, though signs are posted warning against spitting. Another acquaintance said many people wear masks, and that he could barely breathe and had trouble seeing because of his constantly burning, watering eyes. Doesn’t this sound like a delightful experience for those folks lucky enough to travel to Beijing to watch the games? And how, I wonder, will the athletes be able to compete if they have trouble breathing? Anyone who has participated in any sport, even just for fun, knows you need to take in more air when playing or doing anything strenuous. Olympic level athletes, who are the fittest among us, give their all (physically) while competing and get winded even when the air is relatively clean. How many will have to drop out, or literally drop and be carried off because of the conditions in which they will be competing?

While travelers to Beijing are not watching the games, if they are able to see through and actually breathe the filthy air, perhaps they will learn other things about China that will leave them with a far more negative opinion than if they had simply joined a boycott. In other words, let’s just give China enough rope….

Are you buying into the Bush Crime Syndicate’s fear mongering.  Have you become so paranoid that you are seeing a terrorist behind every bush?  OR are you seeing a Bush behind every terrorist?