Monthly Archive for September, 2009Page 2 of 5

Memories

Warning. It's late I can't sleep and I'm not doing much editing for spelling, content, factual errors or reasoning. Enjoy!

A friend got me thinking about memories. I thought of how it's usually imposible to know, what is really a memory and what is just remembering the story. It's part of the computer code, it saves the data but just like how text takes less space than video. Anyway she talked about specific things, like colors, stand out for her. My memory is pretty vague. I just remember some basic rough draft type info and a feeling, maybe an image or two. It's the feelings though that really stand out. Feelings, they're so primal and simple. I can't always tell you why I like something, wine and movies come to mind. I can't always explain why one stupid comedy is hillarious and another is just stupid. But there is a difference. My dad has a great method for judging a live singing of the star spangled banner. Side note for all the shit I give our country for not living up to our own ideals I must say we have a pretty bad ass national anthem, done right it's impressive. You can tell a good rendition of it because the hair on your arms and neck stand up. Which is my fathers test. Feelings, they're strange things, sometimes they're a real pain in the ass. But sometimes they're great. Didn't mean to sound emo there, most of my life is reasonably happy, some things are great. And because as I already said most of my memories are just vague images attached to feelings it's really easy to sort the ones to keep, the good days, from the less important ones, the bad days. Then again that means I could have a pretty terrible life and barely even know it. Nah my life doesn't seem terrible, Oh no! Trapped in my own pointless lodgic.

I was about to say that I lost track of the point of this a while ago, but I'm not sure this post ever really had a point. I think I'm just confused as to why I'm not asleep.

Well thank you to the person who made me think about the past. You know who you are.

And thank you to ABC for being mostly awesome.
Or was it amazing?

Life


So I've got a new job. Just part time at the bike shop. I like it. It's nice going to work and actually having work to do. Plus I get a discount on bike stuff.

The complicated situation I talked about before has changed, we got in a huge fight over the douche bag, then we were cool again for a little bit. Then she said we couldn't talk for a while. Her life was getting too complicated and stressful. So she wanted to kick both of us out of her life, at least for a while. I thought that was pretty fucked up, yet understandable. Part of me just wanted to show up on her doorstep, if she really wanted to say goodbye I felt like I at least deserved a goodbye in person, not a text. But I said fuck that, if I mean so little to her that she can just be done with me like that then fine it is better to just walk away. So then after a week she started talking to me again. Apparently she saw this blog and said I should update it because my feelings have probably changed. It's true they have. Even within a couple days of writing that things had changed. I really care about her a lot and thats all i know with any certainty. I hope we can stay friends, it's nice to have friends with differing views.


Life


So I've got a new job. Just part time at the bike shop. I like it. It's nice going to work and actually having work to do. Plus I get a discount on bike stuff.

The complicated situation I talked about before has changed, we got in a huge fight over the douche bag, then we were cool again for a little bit. Then she said we couldn't talk for a while. Her life was getting too complicated and stressful. So she wanted to kick both of us out of her life, at least for a while. I thought that was pretty fucked up, yet understandable. Part of me just wanted to show up on her doorstep, if she really wanted to say goodbye I felt like I at least deserved a goodbye in person, not a text. But I said fuck that, if I mean so little to her that she can just be done with me like that then fine it is better to just walk away. So then after a week she started talking to me again. Apparently she saw this blog and said I should update it because my feelings have probably changed. It's true they have. Even within a couple days of writing that things had changed. I really care about her a lot and thats all i know with any certainty. I hope we can stay friends, it's nice to have friends with differing views.


Fun and Games – Ye Ye Ye

Geoffrey Oryema's range. Both are best in HD (click on links).


Fun and Games - Ye Ye Ye



"While I was making this one I was struck by the fact that right-wing bigots would probably be tolerant of the native costumes, but prejudiced against the gay guys who are also playing at dress-up and face-paint."

Land of Anaka

The Future of Elles?

I suppose in making this post my purpose here is to simply mark a time of ambiguity in my blogging career.

In case you haven’t noticed, I don’t blog very often any more. At least, not as much as I used to.

Most of this I attribute to the fact that school keeps me increasingly busy nowadays so I don’t keep up with stuff as much, anymore. Part of it I attribute to my Twitter account. Instead of posting articles I find and my commentary here, I usually just put it up on my Twitter and sum up my likes  or dislikes in less than 140 characters. And, there’s also the matter of Teen Skepchick, which I know I can cross-post stuff from there onto here, but I try to keep content rather separate, so when I do have something to write about it usually goes there.

But sometimes I wonder if it’s just because I’m sick of repeating myself. How many times can you refute the same tired old creationist question of “if humans came from monkeys, why are there still monkeys”?

Yesterday, I realized that I have been posting slightly more regularly on Teen Skepchick than on this blog, and I kind of feel like the reason I’m doing that is it seems a more important project to me. So what if I stopped posting here altogether? Well, I dunno.

Apparently, I’ve also just changed my blog name from Splendid Elles to Plain and Simple Elles on a whim. The “plain and simple” bit is a reference from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine which I’ve been watching a lot of, but I won’t go into a description of the particular scene because it’s not that important. I think it’s because I, Elles, am many things, not just “splendid”, and I want people to think about me as a complex whole that is Elles, and not just “The Splendid One”. I may change the name back, we’ll see.

Advice is welcome, but I promise you that when I do have time, and when I do see misinformation in the media, in creationist propaganda, or anywhere from an Internet chatroom to a lunchtime discussion, I’ll be here to call “them” out on it.


Is The Force Against Tesco?

A chap by the name of Daniel Jones was asked to leave a Tesco store in Bangor, north Wales, after refusing to remove a hood that he 'believes' he has to wear in public as part of his religion, and is now considering taking legal action against the company.

Mr Jones, 23, is the founder of the 'International Church of Jediism', which apparently has as many as 500,000 followers worldwide.

Jones (a.k.a. Morda Hehol) said: "It states in our Jedi doctrination (sic) that I can wear headwear. It just covers the back of my head, you have a choice of wearing headwear in your home or at work but you have to wear a cover for your head when you are in public."

He obviously wrote the religion quite well and thought about how to get attention - doubtless you don't have to wear a hood at home because a) no-one is looking and b) you might get a bit hot and sweaty. Similarly when at work because a) you don't want to look a complete freak in front of your colleagues without at least a few hundred years of tradition to support your 'choice' of apparel and b) you'd never get hired in the first place. Speaking as an employer, if any prospective candidate came to an interview wearing a hood and claiming to be a Jedi, I most assuredly would not hire them, however good their CV. Whether you wish to interpret this as religious discrimination or discrimination against the mentally ill is up to you.
In public, of course, one must make a visual statement of your religion; how else is anybody to know that you have chosen the path to salvation and all who disagree are damned?

In response a wag from Tesco's PR department said: "He hasn't been banned. Jedis are very welcome to shop in our stores although we would ask them to remove their hoods. Obi-Wan Kenobi, Yoda and Luke Skywalker all appeared hoodless without ever going over to the Dark Side and we are only aware of the Emperor as one who never removed his hood.If Jedi walk around our stores with their hoods on, they'll miss lots of special offers." Clearly they're not fearing a land-mark legal ruling or a massive compensation claim - they'll probably get away with giving him an apology and a light-sabre.

I'm not sure how to take this... If the guy is being genuine and really thinks his religious freedom has been infringed upon, then he either needs psychiatric help or a good kicking, I'm not sure which. It's possible however that it's just a stunt to show up just how ridiculous the laws protecting religious expression are, and how damaging they can be when used by some people with a politico-religiously motivated agenda. I'm sure most of you remember that Tesco recently faced a legal challenge, under the same set of laws, from a Muslim store worker who refused to handle alcohol (despite being well aware that this would be part of their job). The Chemist chain Boots was also in the spotlight, about a year ago I think, after a pharmacist - a pharmacist! - refused to dispense the contraceptive pill because it went against her religious beliefs.

So if the former is the case, then I'm sorry Mr Hehol, but you're just a sad little wanker. And if the latter, then thank you Mr Jones for bringing down such a great deal of derision and ridicule upon your head in pursuit of reminding us all just how stupid the laws pertaining to the free practice of religion are. The Jury is still out.

Dante, Socrates, and ‘Situational Ethics’

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In Plato’s Apology, Socrates speaks movingly about the prospects of his imminent death. He finds no reason for alarm over his upcoming demise, as he sees two possibilities beyond the grave: the first is blissful unawareness and the utter destruction of consciousness, Hamlet’s consummation devoutly to be wished; the second is an afterlife in which all souls of the dead would be able to socialize, converse, and generally pal around together. (Shame on Socrates for thinking that only these two possibilities might obtain. For someone of his intellect, he should have recognized that when speculating on matters that cannot be investigated, there are literally an infinity of possibilities). Socrates says:

What would not a man give if he might converse with Orpheus and Musaeus and Hesiod and Homer? … What would not a man give, O judges, to be able to examine the leader of the great Trojan expedition; or Odysseus or Sisyphus, or numberless others, men and women too?

According to The Divine Comedy, it is the second scenario that is the fate for Socrates, for there he is, in the First Circle of Hell, with other great minds and heroes from the classical world – the likes of Homer, Ovid, Aristotle, Democritus, Aeneas and Hector. And just as he anticipated, it isn’t a bad life (or afterlife), but it isn’t heaven, either. The residents here are in Limbo: they are not tortured, burned, maimed, or harassed by demons. They are left to share each other’s company and certainly must have a number of stimulating discourses. (It always seemed that, given how the treatment in the Vestibule is so much worse than that in Limbo, that they should be reversed.) But these souls are yet denied the pleasures of Paradise, and this is something that these ancient worthies are aware of, and which they no doubt commiserate over.

Why were these Virtuous Pagans sent to a benign part of Hell instead of being rewarded for their virtues in Heaven? Through no fault of their own, they were born at the wrong time, before that glorious age when God finally had His Plan all worked out and sent His Son to earth to suffer that famous, staged death. And only those people that had the opportunity to accept Christ would be given the chance to get to Paradise. Regardless of how moral anyone born before that time might have been, regardless of any brave or selfless acts they may have committed, or what mysteries they may have solved, they were, in the modern vernacular, Shit-Outta-Luck.

It hardly seems fair to run a world that way, but let’s give Dante the benefit of the doubt. Let’s take the tack that those born before Christ’s time didn’t know the full rules of the game, so to speak, so they couldn’t earn the rewards of accepting Him- but at least they would not incur the harsh penalties reserved for those that violated Christian laws, either.

Except that isn’t quite the way it plays out. Recall Socrates mentioned Odysseus (that is, Ulysses), as one of the persons he looked forward to meeting after death. But that intrepid wanderer isn’t there in Dante’s First Circle. Socrates must have been disappointed. It turns out that Socrates will not be speaking with him at all. Odysseus is in Hell, to be sure, but he isn’t in Limbo with so many other Greeks. Because he was regarded as an “Evil Counselor” he has been sent to the Eight Circle, where his afterlife isn’t very pleasant; it involves a bit of roasting.

So, for Dante, the punishments of Hell are enforced retroactively, while the rewards of Heaven are not. Regardless of your virtues, if you lived before a certain date, you cannot get the full rewards offered to others. But you can still incur the penalties of sin. It is also an admission that the standards of good and evil existed before God set them out explicitly in the Christian version, although the consequences and rewards are not meted out consistently.

Then, there is also the matter of the souls that were removed from the First Circle during ‘the harrowing of Hell.’ These include Adam, Abel, Abraham, Rachel, David, Moses, and Noah, all born before Christ as well, but given Get Out Of Hell Free cards because they were mentioned in the Old Testament, apparently. The likes of Abraham, he who was prepared to murder his own son at the behest of the voices in his head, and Moses, the leader that slaughtered countless innocents and condemned countless young women to slavery and rape, go to Heaven. Socrates, brilliant philosopher and advocate of reason, stays in Hell.

I imagine Socrates would not be impressed with this scheme. Nor Odysseus, for that matter. And I’m reminded of how various fundamentalists decry the values of secularists and humanists as involving “situational ethics.” As if Christianity is some kind of model for the notion of objective rules and punishments. A few hours browsing in the Old Testament should convince anyone that there has never been a more haphazard, inconsistent, and ever-shifting system of morality than the one that the Hebrew God acted by.


Ahmadinejad Still in Denial


That ridiculous little election-stealing monkey, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, was once more railing against Israel and denying the Holocaust, at a rally held in Tehran for the annual Al-Quds day. Al-Quds day was instigated by Ayatollah Khomeini shortly after the revolution of 1979, as a day for Muslims around the world to protest against the creation of Israel and the treatment of Palestinians.

Please do not assume that my reference to the dirty, ranting, crumpled little cretin as a 'monkey' is in any way indicative of racism - I am talking only about him, not his co-nationals or co-regionalists (incidentally, Persian women are some of the most beautiful in the world, which is probably why we're not allowed to look at them, but I digress now and am sounding sexist instead of racist, so I'd better move on) I speak only of the fact that he bears an uncanny resemblance to lieutenant Columbo after three weeks on the street. Also, you have to admit that he does look a bit like a monkey.

Of course appearance counts for little where politics is concerned (haha), politics being a discipline where substance is all (haha, again) and we all know that the backbone of Hobo-dinejad's policies involve hating Israel, hating Jews, and giving any Iranian with more than half a brain a strong desire to emigrate. Oh, and of course being the region's military great-power; any chance of the country taking it's rightful place as the region's economic and technological power-house being thoroughly stifled by corruption and religion.

So Tramp-adinejad and his fanatical bigots were rallying yesterday to celebrate Al-Quds. The supporters of his 'defeated' election rival, Mir-Hossein Mousavi, were also out and about being attacked by the state's thugs, sorry police, and Mr Mousavi himself was forced to leave the rally after his car was attacked.

Mr Beggar-dinejad said that the Holocaust was "a lie based on an unprovable and mythical claim" and that "the pretext for the creation of the Zionist regime is false."

It never ceases to amaze me that the political leader of a country entirely based upon centuries old mythical claims can reject mountains, and I do mean mountains, of real, recent, tangible evidence that several million people were murdered for their beliefs just a couple of generations ago, simply for political expedience. I really wonder how many Muslims (and I know it's not just Muslims, before you write in - there are a surprising number of Christian Holocaust deniers too) around the World do not believe that the Holocaust took place. And this is the nub of the matter, the problem with their position is simply one of belief. To the religious mind, belief trumps all else, and the desire to believe a premise is often all that is required to accept it, IE believe it. Evidence to the contrary of your accepted position simply becomes an inconvenience to be skirted around and dismissed - IE dis-believed . For example - I hate Jews, however happy the idea of five million of them dying would make me, I don't want to accept that this happened, because it is convenient for me to believe that it was all a conspiracy to create a Western-friendly state in the middle east, and displace millions of my co-religionists. Because I want to believe this, all evidence that contradicts my position must be false. Only the religious mind can work in this fashion, can work on the principle that truth is something to be chosen and moulded by your preconceptions, rather than something real and definite that exists outside of yourself.

Ahma-dinnerjacket's comments regarding the Holocaust brought the usual condemnation from Western leaders, and the usual 'concerns' regarding Iran's nuclear program, as well as the renewed threat of even more sanctions. I wonder if it might be more appropriate for the World's leaders just to ignore these outbursts - would it not be more effective for World leaders just to laugh at him? To treat him with the derision that this pathetic little excuse for a man deserves, and perhaps to send him a box of bananas, or a signed portrait of Peter Falk? I wonder if my opinions exclude me from a career in the diplomatic corps...

And Speaking of Crazy

Frank sold me a copy of his book pretty much from, "Hello."  And when you get to the line about the village and the village idiot, it's OK to experience a sort of burning envy that you didn't think of it first. 

For Humans Only

I love stories that take real people and put them in impossible, outlandish situations. Basically, if you’re going to make things up, you might as well really go to town on it … but the story still needs to be populated by characters that feel, well, real. This is why I like Battlestar Galactica - [...]

Dawkins on "sophisticated theologians"

Now, there is a certain class of sophisticated modern theologian who will say something like this: “Good heavens, of course we are not so naive or simplistic as to care whether God exists. Existence is such a 19th-century preoccupation! It doesn’t matter whether God exists in a scientific sense. What matters is whether he exists for you or for me. If God is real for you, who cares whether science has made him redundant? Such arrogance! Such elitism.”

Well, if that’s what floats your canoe, you’ll be paddling it up a very lonely creek. The mainstream belief of the world’s peoples is very clear. They believe in God, and that means they believe he exists in objective reality, just as surely as the Rock of Gibraltar exists. If sophisticated theologians or postmodern relativists think they are rescuing God from the redundancy scrap-heap by downplaying the importance of existence, they should think again. Tell the congregation of a church or mosque that existence is too vulgar an attribute to fasten onto their God, and they will brand you an atheist. They’ll be right.

– Richard Dawkins (source)


Copyright © 2012 Way of the Mind

Collision movie preview – Hitchens vs. Wilson



Part two: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v2_T5h8KK5Q

Part three: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FBL9OMCfT28

For more info go here: http://www.collisionmovie.com/

Collision movie preview – Hitchens vs. Wilson



Part two: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v2_T5h8KK5Q

Part three: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FBL9OMCfT28

For more info go here: http://www.collisionmovie.com/

Suess Vows

Do you take Caroline as your wife?
I do.
Will you love her in a boat?
And will you lover her near a goat?
I will love her in a boat,
I will love her near a goat.
Will you love her in the rain?
And in the dark? And on a train?
I will love her in the rain, in the dark, and on a train.
And in a car? And in a tree?
I will, she is so good, so good, you see!

So you will love her in a box.
And you will love her near a fox.
I will love her in a box,
I will love her near a fox.

And you will love her in a house.
And you will love her near a mouse.
And I will love her in a house,
And I will love her near a mouse.

And you will love her here and there.
I will love her here and there.
Say: I will love her ANYWHERE!
I will love her ANYWHERE!

Suess Vows

Do you take Caroline as your wife?
I do.
Will you love her in a boat?
And will you lover her near a goat?
I will love her in a boat,
I will love her near a goat.
Will you love her in the rain?
And in the dark? And on a train?
I will love her in the rain, in the dark, and on a train.
And in a car? And in a tree?
I will, she is so good, so good, you see!

So you will love her in a box.
And you will love her near a fox.
I will love her in a box,
I will love her near a fox.

And you will love her in a house.
And you will love her near a mouse.
And I will love her in a house,
And I will love her near a mouse.

And you will love her here and there.
I will love her here and there.
Say: I will love her ANYWHERE!
I will love her ANYWHERE!

Rowan Williams on Newsnight

His Holiness The Bearded One was on BBC's Newsnight program 'Aftershock, The Crash A Year On' on Tuesday night (the title of this post is a link to the video on the BBC's iplayer service) to discuss the causes and effects of the crash. As you may remember, The Bearded One and his conservative side-kick Dr John Sentamu both made a little bit of a stir last year as the crash was unfolding, by comparing money to a new idol that has been worshipped by certain sectors of the business community (See Hypocrites? Of course not, they're our spiritual leaders! for my take on this at the time).

Admittedly the Archbishop was not given a central role in the program - about 40 minutes were taken up with reports by the economics editor and a debate between business leaders, an ex bank chairman and economics professors - but he was interviewed for several minutes, and his answers were treated with real respect by the interviewer, Jeremy Paxman, a man noted for his tendency to rip less exalted interviewees to shreds.

Everyone has an opinion on this subject, of course, indeed we're all experts now, but where is the sense, and what is the point, of giving serious air time and credence on a serious news program - this edition of which was entirely devoted to a matter of global significance, the effects of which may be felt for generations - to a man who has devoted his life to the study and interpretation of unreality?
Paxman's first question may just have carried a twinge of sarcasm - he basically asked the Archbishop if he thought it was odd that the political leaders who espoused the credit-based capitalism blamed for the collapse (Tony Blair, George Bush et al) were Christians. The bearded one gave a small wry smile at this, but answered that yes he did think it was odd, especially when 'some of the inspiration for Tony Blair's ideology did come from communitarian and non-strictly capitalist origins'. So straight away, we're in to the important stuff - Christians were in charge, why did their Christian values not stop this greed? Can anyone else see a little smidgen of irony here?

I've transcribed the rest of the interview for you below (see how thoughtful I am?) to save you the bother of watching the video, though I do recommend watching it anyway as it has good entertainment value. The Archbishop's interview begins about two-thirds of the way through the program.

'I think what happened was an enormous wave of unreality, in the whole system whereby the connection of financial instruments, financial operations, with reality, with production, with relationships just disappeared.'
Paxman - 'Do you wish now that the Church had spoken out more about that climate?'
'I guess I do, but I suppose like most people we felt intimidated by expertise, and that's a very dangerous place for the Church to be, because what I hear now is people saying that experts, in fact, didn't know particularly what they were talking about, there was an enormous confidence trick going on.'
Paxman - 'They convinced the rest of us they did'
'They convinced the rest of us, because I think that most of us have grown up with the idea that economics is an exact science, and that suggests that we haven't actually read Keynes in the first place, because Keynes' stress on uncertainty as something utterly unavoidable in economic activity beyond a certain level, that again seems to have vanished.'
Paxman - 'What do you think this whole crisis has done to us?'
'It's left us I think with, as we saw in the clip just now [reference to a report by economics editor Paul Mason] a quite strong sense of diffused resentment, there hasn't been a feeling of closure about what happened last year, there hasn't been what I as a Christian would call repentance, we haven't heard people saying that actually, no, we got it wrong, the whole, fundamental principle on which we worked was unreal, was empty.'
Paxman - 'You're talking about the bankers now?'
'I'm talking about bankers but also about all of us who, as you reminded me, Church included, colluded with this.'
Paxman - 'So we should all repent of what...'
'We should all I think, look back and say...
'Politicians too?
'Politicians too...'
'Everybody?...'
'We can look back and say, well we, we were, hypnotised into that sense of unreality, we allowed a big gulf to open up between how finance appeared to be operating and what it was really generating in terms of wealth, as well being for a community.'
P - 'What do you think we should have learned from what's happened?'
'Certainly that economics is too important to be left to economists, that there is no such thing as the rational self-regulating market beyond a very very limited range of activities, therefore that awkward amateurs do have their role in this, whether it's artists or historians or even the odd theologian [wry smile] coming in to say, well, what is wealth? What is this wealth creation that we talk about? We can understand how investment and production that allows purchasing power to be in the hands of more people, that's wealth creation. Whether wealth creation is simply the statistic of a larger amount of money on paper or a screen to be concentrated in certain hands, whether that counts as wealth creation, I'm not even sure.'
P - 'And when you see, as we are told now, of many of the financial institutions going back to business as usual before hand, bonuses and all the rest of it, what do you think?'
'I worry. I feel that, that that's precisely what I call the lack of closure, coming home to roost, it's a failure to name what was wrong, to name that, erm, well, what I called last year idolatry, that, projecting reality and substance on to things that don't have them.'
P - 'What should the Government have done'
'[laughs softly] I think the Government was bound to act, in the way it did as a damage limitation exercise, I, I'm not an economist, I can't comment on the details of that. I saw what Baroness Vadera [Junior minister in the department of business]said about that earlier today in the Standard [London Evening Standard, daily newspaper] I understand the motivation, I don't know what Governments can do...'
P - 'Should they have capped bonuses?'
'I would have said yes, yes, and I think that, that's one of those things that, feeds, the, what I call the diffused resentment that people are...'
P - 'Mm'
'... Somehow getting away with a culture in which the connection between the worth of what you do and what you get, again becomes more obscure.'
P - 'You've referred to resentment now two or three times, [pause] how strongly felt is that? Do, do, d'you, d'you, d'you fear unrest almost?'
'I wouldn't go as far as that, what I'm picking up is just that sense of, of, bafflement, of, a muted anger, that the bonus culture isn't challenged, I wouldn't say unrest but I think that what we are looking at is, is, the possibility of a society getting more and more dysfunctional if the levels of inequality that we've seen in the last couple of decades are not challenged.'
Paxman thanks him and closes the interview.

OK, so I've just transcribed it without dropping in any comments of my own. I am pretty sure that any atheists reading this have spotted the irony and hypocrisy a mile off, and I would put a little bit of money on most Christians spotting it too, but just in case you haven't, go back through the transcript and wherever you see a reference to 'finance', 'economist' or 'wealth' etc, substitute 'religion', 'Christianity', 'God' or 'The Church', and hopefully the hypocrisy will leap from the page.

I'm not saying that the man didn't have anything worth saying about the subject, he is, after all, a decent and intelligent chap, but as I said, we all have an opinion about this subject now, and he was giving his opinion as leader of our State Religion. I would therefore give his utterances more value if he had merely given the interview as Dr R. Williams, 'Concerned' of Canterbury.

I can sense your disappointment there, yes you at the back - 'What! how can he transcribe a whole interview without dropping in his customary sarcasm?' Well fear not, because I can't resist it, I just didn't want to clutter up a decently funny interview with my pointless witterings until you had a chance to read it for yourselves.

There now follows the same transcript, with previous square brackets removed, and my own attempt at humour and/or outrage inserted.

'I think what happened was an enormous wave of unreality, in the whole system whereby the connection of financial instruments, financial operations, with reality, with production, with relationships just disappeared.'
Paxman - 'Do you wish now that the Church had spoken out more about that climate?'
'I guess I do, but I suppose like most people we felt intimidated by expertise, and that's a very dangerous place for the Church to be,[Should be used to it after 300 years] because what I hear now is people saying that experts, in fact, didn't know particularly what they were talking about, [We in the Church do, of course] there was an enormous confidence trick going on.' [!!]
Paxman - 'They convinced the rest of us they did'
'They convinced the rest of us, because I think that most of us have grown up with the idea that economics is an exact science, [just as many of us were forced to grow up believing the Church is aways right] and that suggests that we haven't actually read Keynes in the first place, because Keynes' stress on uncertainty as something utterly anavoidable in economic activity beyond a certain level, that again seems to have vanished.' [Last year he quoted Marx, now he's invoking Keynes - are we seeing a further shift to left in the Church?]
Paxman - 'What do you think this whole crisis has done to us?'
'It's left us I think with, as we saw in the clip just now a quite strong sense of diffused resentment, [and a great deal more uncertainty that my minions are even now attempting to capitalise on (Church attendance is reportedly up in some areas as a direct consequence of 'material uncertainty')] there hasn't been a feeling of closure about what happened last year, there hasn't been what I as a Christian would call repentance, [repent ye sinners! Fill our collection plates!] we haven't heard people saying that actually, no, we got it wrong, the whole, fundamental principle on which we worked was unreal, was empty.' [We will never see this day while belief is prevalent, maybe one day.]
Paxman - 'You're talking about the bankers now?'
'I'm talking about bankers but also about all of us who, as you reminded me, Church included, colluded with this.'
Paxman - 'So we should all repent of what...'
'We should all I think, look back and say...
'Politicians too?
'Politicians too...'
'Everybody?...'
'We can look back and say, well we, we were, hypnotised into that sense of unreality, we allowed a big gulf to open up between how finance appeared to be operating and what it was really generating in terms of wealth, as well being for a community.' [Just keep substituting 'religion' for 'finance', no further comment is required]
P - 'What do you think we should have learned from what's happened?'
'Certainly that economics [theology] is too important to be left to economists, [theologians] that there is no such thing as the rational self-regulating market [religion] beyond a very very limited range of activities, [preferably none at all] therefore that awkward amateurs [non-believers] do have their role in this, whether it's artists or historians or even the odd theologian [scientist] coming in to say, well, what is wealth? [religion?] What is this wealth creation [fiction] that we talk about? We can understand how investment and production that allows purchasing power to be in the hands of more people, that's wealth creation. Whether wealth creation is simply the statistic of a larger amount of money on paper or a screen to be concentrated in certain hands, whether that counts as wealth creation, I'm not even sure.'
P - 'And when you see, as we are told now, of many of the financial institutions going back to business as usual before hand, bonuses and all the rest of it, what do you think?'
'I worry. I feel that, that that's precisely what I call the lack of closure, coming home to roost, it's a failure to name what was wrong, to name that, erm, well, what I called last year idolatry, [said the man with a graven image of a man suffering unspeakable torture dangling from his neck] that, projecting reality and substance on to things that don't have them.' [!!]
P - 'What should the Government have done'
'I think the Government was bound to act, in the way it did as a damage limitation exercises, I, I'm not an economist, [I don't have any more of an idea than the rest of you; the fact that I am a spiritual leader, well versed in bullshit, lends credence and authority to my opinion] I can't comment on the details of that. I saw what Baroness Vadera said about that earlier today in the Standard. I understand the motivation, I don't know what Governments can do...'
P - 'Should they have capped bonuses?'
'I would have said yes, yes, and I think that, that's one of those things that, feeds, the, what I call the diffused resentment that people are...'
P - 'Mm'
'... Somehow getting away with a culture in which the connection between the worth of what you do and what you get, again becomes more obscure.'
P - 'You've referred to resentment now two or three times, [pause] how strongly felt is that? Do, do, d'you, d'you, d'you fear unrest almost?'
'I wouldn't go as far as that, what I'm picking up is just that sense of, of, bafflement, of, a muted anger, that the bonus culture isn't challenged, I wouldn't say unrest but I think that what we are looking at is, is, the possibility of a society getting more and more dysfunctional [said the chap who not so long ago voiced the opinion that adopting some aspects of Sharia law in the UK is 'unavoidable'] if the levels of inequality that we've seen in the last couple of decades are not challenged.' [Thanks for having me, I'm off back to the palace now for a couple of sherries and a quick chat with God before bed.]

There simply is no sense in giving authority to the words of a spiritual leader, when they are speaking as such. I would ask that the BBC ask someone more qualified to give their opinion and fill five minutes next time - just grab a random passing bloke off the street for a good common-man's opinion. Alternatively, for balance they should also invite the chief Rabbi and whichever member of the Muslim Council of Great Britain is currently claiming to speak for all Muslims five minutes too, then I could write a post three times as long.